Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

   Since it was on of the most popular apps download and played in 2013.......Anyone knows when Candy Crush is sending us our W-2's???

   Inmates in Miami Beach can now tweet Justin Beiber and poke him on after his Face got booked!

   I actually feel bad for Justin Bieber. No girl should have to take a picture without her makeup on

   Awe poor Justin Bieber, I'll think about you whenever I push a hemorrhoid back in.

   Thanks to Richard Sherman, we have a new word: Thugger.

   she said she was getting close to 40 and I ask from what side?

   Okay, admit it. You're secretly hoping Justin Bieber does his Paul Walker impersonation.

   Her: My boss treats me like his servant!! Me: I’m sorry, you deserve better. What’s for dinner?

   Well, The Captain & Tennille are getting a divorce. I guess he did that to her one too many times.

   Why do people post missing person posts on facebook? Like we're going outside...

   Chinese smog drifting east and is now covering parts of California. Yet another American icon has been outsourced.

   If your job is to follow celebrities around taking their picture, I only have one question. What keeps you from killing yourself??

   there anything more capitalist than a peanut with a top hat, cane, and monocle selling you other peanuts to eat

   Sometimes when I tag someone in a pic I whisper "you're it."

   They should of put Justn Bieber in Rikers Island prison with lifers.

   If a niqqa slap me on Vine the rest of the fight will continue on YouTube

   "for just 15 cents a day" ...*changeschannel*

   You're not the only one who's empty inside, coffee mug.

   I take great pride in the fact that I've never wasted time in playing stupid games like Candy Crush

   Lawyers do this cute little thing where they say "retainer fee" but they really mean "BJ".