BEGO Funny Status Messages

   Money doesn't bring happiness although… shopping does!

   Drama = Dumb Retard Asking for More Attention

   Don't waste your time on things that only hurt you, and remember to forget those who forget you.

   I can't even imagine what people did at red lights before cellphones.

   You know why there are no wal-marts in Afghanistan? Cause theres a Target in every corner...

   I can't hear you, so I'll just laugh and hope it wasn't a question

   If I actually did "live like there's no tomorrow". I'd be in jail.

   You're the one who posted over a thousand pictures of yourself on-line, why does looking at them make me the weird one?

   Insanity is doing the same thing over & over again & expecting different results. In other words, I just logged into Facebook.

   I'd explain it to you, but your brain would explode.

   Are you supposed to get an email that says “HAHAHAHAHA” after signing up for Match.com?

   Treat your girl right, or another guy will

   Hey MARIO..!! Remember me??? I wasted my CHILDHOOD saving your girlfriend

   There are only 2 types of honest people in this world, small children & drunk people

   Some people would be in such good shape if they ran as much as their mouth does

   The only reason nice guys finish last is because they're holding the door for everyone else.

   WOW!!!! Gas is $3.85 what happened to $3.99? I can finally stop getting money out of my savings just to get gas

   Men are like mascara, they usually run at the first sign of emotion.

   They say when a man holds a woman's hand before marriage, it is love, after marriage, it is self-defense.

   Always believe a woman when she says: “You don't want to know!”