Prince Shawn Funny Status Messages

   After spending the night with a stripper named KARMA last night, the phrase "Karma is coming for you" took on a whole new meaning!

   doesn't wear a yellow hat when he goes to the zoo because he doesn't want any of the monkeys following him home.

   Garbage men are the least respected civil servants. They work just as hard as firemen and cops, but no one ever calls them heroes. Probably because they smell like used tampons and old Chinese food.

   used to go to random weddings back in the day just to put a picture of his junk on every disposable camera.

   feels sorry every summer for anyone named Eve.

   loves dating defense attorneys because they are incredibly good at getting guys off.

   Bert and Ernie are a perfect closeted TV couple. You are not sure they are gay, but you can't prove they aren't.

   your outfit makes you look like a stripper. A high end stripper for governors and athletes, but a stripper nonetheless.

   has pants that say Snickers on them because they are packed with nuts and they always satisfy.

   has found that the best thing about dating a homeless woman is that when the night's over, you can drop her off anywhere.

   Thank you internet. before you came along, I had to stare out the window to laugh at strangers.

   It's hard for me to take the things you say seriously when I know what's been in that mouth of yours.

   had a job as a bartender once at a lesbian bar, but was fired after turning too many women straight.

   completely worn out after spending the whole weekend at a genital jamboree.

   went to a carnival trying to win an X-box Kinect and the next thing he knew , he'd lost his entire life savings and all he had to show for it was a giant banana with dreadlocks.

   used to arrive fashionably late to parties until he realized it didn't matter because the party only starts when he arrives.

   when you're stressed, you eat Ice cream, cake, chocolate and sweets. Why? Because stressed spelled backwards is Desserts.

   sprung after seeing a girl walk in with an itty bitty waist and put a round thing in his face.

   I always wanted to know how long 'forever' was and by looking at some people's relationships, it's around 3 to 4 weeks.

   hanging out with his friends Mike Rotch and Jenny Talia.