RoN Funny Status Messages

   wishes the voices in his head would quit singing off-key

   's friend was hit by a Dodge, which he/she found both funny and ironic.

   standing on his front lawn with his pants down waiting for Google Earth to come by and take his picture...

   an appetite for destruction...and he is starving this week

   taking a mental vaction. Leave a message, and when my mind returns I will get back to you.

   Don't cry over spilt milk. Unless, you're stranded on a island and a genie shows up and offers you a lifetime of pleasure in exchange for your last glass of milk and you leap with glee and nearly spill your milk, then after you sigh in relief that it

   Happy Star Wars day! (May the 4th be with you)

   on a bus with his goldfish Gill, going to Lake Winnipesaukee to see Dr. Leo Marvin.

   wishes his lawn was emo, then maybe it would cut itself.

   glad to see they are considering banning ED drug ads during the day. I hope the penalties are stiff.

   wondering, aside from that one thing, how did Mary Todd Lincoln like the play?

   thinks it's a dog eat dog world, and he somehow ended up wearing ground beef underpants.

   was such a Don Juan growing up, the girls Don Juan anything to do with him...

   going to use this status as a letter to guys. If you use a picture of yourself without a shirt, "flexing" as your profile pic....You're officially a jackass.

   glad Justin brought sexy back, I didn't mean to scare it away to begin with.

   wonders if people who use sign language are allowed to talk with their mouth full....

   says it's been a rough day. I got up this morning .... put on a shirt and a button fell off. I picked up my briefcase and the handle came off. I'm afraid to go to the bathroom....

   going to wear underwear on the outside of his clothes tomorrow to see if people assume he's crazy, or a superhero.

   's heard about the fountain of youth, he would much prefer there be a fountain of smart.

   thinks it is just about time for people to get off their dead asses and start looking into all of the corn that Jimmy has been cracking.