Tjshome.com
Funny Status Messages
Submit Status
TJ's Blog
Image Filters
Contact US
Submit a Status Message
Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
Sort:
Recent
|
Oldest
|
Rating
Search Messages:
«Prev
«1
91
92
93
94
95
96
97
98
Next»
Most Recent
Page: 95 of 6389
Music is much more enjoyable if you listen with your eyes shut. It is also more enjoyable if the people sitting near you would listen with their mouths shut
24
3
←Rate |
12-08-2017 04:21
Comments (
0
)
It's better to be kissed by a fool than to be fooled by a kiss.
24
3
←Rate |
12-15-2017 13:59 by
@BlackieBino1
Comments (
0
)
I named my WiFi after my last girlfriend because it's never fully connected with me. And also because I caught my neighbor using it.
24
3
←Rate |
02-07-2018 10:28 by
MDS
Comments (
1
)
Women who say the quickest way to a man's heart is through his stomach hasn't seen his browser history
24
3
←Rate |
02-08-2018 03:07
Comments (
0
)
I want my tombstone to read; "I don't know where ya’ll gonna get your laughs now"
24
3
←Rate |
03-25-2018 06:54
Comments (
0
)
remember the time you confused a life lesson for a soulmate?
24
3
←Rate |
03-30-2018 14:53
Comments (
0
)
Adulting is putting back a pack of chicken for $8.58 because you see one for $8.17...
24
3
←Rate |
11-07-2019 11:11 by
Gabe
Comments (
0
)
Me: sorry mom, called you by accident.. Mom: no worries, had you by accident.
24
3
←Rate |
11-22-2019 05:31
Comments (
0
)
Ever notice how that toothpaste falls so easily off your brush, but you can't wash it down the drain if you wanted to...
24
3
←Rate |
01-03-2020 20:45
Comments (
0
)
Looks like Bloomberg got stopped and frisked during the debate...
24
3
←Rate |
02-20-2020 08:26 by
Gabe
Comments (
0
)
Bon Jovi must be at least 3/4 of the way there by now.
24
3
←Rate |
02-28-2020 06:23
Comments (
0
)
New pickup line: hey why don't you come back to my place, I have toilet paper😉
24
3
←Rate |
03-11-2020 03:21
Comments (
0
)
So showing up at the bank with a mask and gloves is okay now
24
3
←Rate |
03-20-2020 02:40
Comments (
0
)
If Hugh Hefner ran a company wearing pajamas so can you.
24
3
←Rate |
04-03-2020 07:24
Comments (
0
)
If you are driving alone in your car with a face mask on... Stay home... Even after this is over...
24
3
←Rate |
04-20-2020 12:26
Comments (
0
)
All the major casinos are complaining about how much money they’ve lost. Now they know how we feel!!
24
3
←Rate |
06-02-2020 17:01
Comments (
0
)
Everything I need to know in life I learned in First Grade... if you poop your pants they let you go home.
24
3
←Rate |
06-05-2020 13:27
Comments (
0
)
So, we tip the pizza delivery guy, but not ambulance drivers.
16
2
←Rate |
10-16-2019 18:04
Comments (
1
)
I think I’d respect captain crunch more if his eyebrows weren’t on his hat
16
2
←Rate |
10-24-2019 14:14
Comments (
0
)
It's a good thing that not everyone owns a smartphone..Someone has to HONK when the light turns green.
16
2
←Rate |
12-10-2019 18:40 by
MiMisHouse
Comments (
0
)
«Prev
«1
91
92
93
94
95
96
97
98
Next»
Most Recent
Submit your own funny facebook status message here:
Name:
Status Message:
X says
X is
X was
X has
X
...
characters left
Read the Rules
Site Links
Home
Funny Status Messages
Status Message Generator
TJ's Blog
About Tjshome
Contact Us
Privacy
© 1999 - 2021 Tjshome.com