love Funny Status Messages

   Endless Love: Stevie Wonder and Ray Charles playing tennis.

   I would love to speak a foreign language but I can't. So I grew hair under my arms instead.

   I love being the first one up in the morning, it gives me time to take all the toilet paper out of the bathrooms for ransom....

   You're in love and I couldn't be happier for you. But can you let go of each others hands for four seconds so I can get past you on the f*ckin sidewalk?"

   Dear Liver: thank you for being a most gracious and forgiving blood filter. Love, me.

   I texted my girlfriend "goodnight, love you" but accidentally sent it to my boss. Now Its awkward, cause he holds my hand during meetings.

   When you love someone more than what they deserve, you get hurt more than what you deserve.

   If my love, honesty, and loyalty aren't good enough for you...the guy in line behind you would love for you to move on.

   I'm currently writing a book about my love of dogs and gardening. It's called b*tches and hoes.

   HIM: “"Promise you'll love me forever." HER: “WTF?!? I don't even love you now.”

   Things to do: 1) Dig a hole 2) Name it love 3) Watch people fall in love.

   S.I.N.G.L.E = Sometimes It's Not Good to Love Everybody

   Oi, FB friends, enjoy, love and relax..... love what you do and love the people around you... but always be prepared to explore and be ready for change............ dont get bored and dont be boring.......

   Don't fall in love, fall off a bridge... Its much less painful

   If you love something, let it go... down on you.

   Here's to the women who love me terribly, May they soon improve.

   Sometimes, I say weird things during intercourse, like "I love you" and/or "Please look directly into the camera and say you have agreed to this."

   A dog asks a cat "How come I've never seen you cats making love in public?" The cat replies, "Do you want humans to steal our style like they did yours?"

   For the love of God, how do I remove Vuze from my computer????

   Cats. Because why should conditional love only come from family?