Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
Page: 6144 of 6371
now I know I havnt really prayed alot but if you're out there save me, superman
←Rate |
02-06-2010 02:18
Comments (0)
George Washington's brother, Larry, was the Uncle of Our Country."
←Rate |
02-06-2010 00:50
Comments (0)
wondering if everyone has an unique Fart Scent.
←Rate |
02-06-2010 00:14
Comments (0)
here to remind you to help control the golfer population. Have your tiger spayed or neutered.
good one Tim. Though, I think the original was better yesterday morning.
←Rate |
02-05-2010 22:37 by tomcal
Comments (0)
just saw a Prius with that brake problem. It was barreling down the road at speeds exceeding 35 MPH.
←Rate |
02-05-2010 22:20 by Tim
Comments (0)
thinks if Bear Grylls would have been in the garden of eden he would have eaten the snake instead of the apple!
saw a middle-eastern friend shaking a carpet on 6th floor balcony. I called out "whats up ahmed, won't it start?"
←Rate |
02-05-2010 22:07 by samdave69
Comments (0)
It's whiter outside than a Pat Boone concert!
←Rate |
02-05-2010 21:56 by The FRED
Comments (0)
I say, when life gives you a lemon, wing it right back and add some lemons of your own!
←Rate |
02-05-2010 21:37 by joe fool
Comments (0)
Girls are like slugs - they probably serve some purpose, but it's hard to imagine what.
←Rate |
02-05-2010 21:26 by joe fool
Comments (0)
Why did someone make a 'Piñata Endangerment Awareness' group on facebook??
←Rate |
02-05-2010 20:48
Comments (0)
doing research to come up with a vaccine for stupidity. Please donate accordingly.
←Rate |
02-05-2010 20:06
Comments (0)
I wonder if Asians throw rice at a Chinese wedding?
better to have a "bottle in front of me" than a "frontal lobotomy"
←Rate |
02-05-2010 19:14
Comments (0)
the definition of Door: What my dog is perpetually on the wrong side of!
←Rate |
02-05-2010 18:53 by Hot Tea
Comments (0)
Why is it that people say they “slept like a baby” when babies wake up like every two hours?
←Rate |
02-05-2010 18:50 by cj
Comments (0)
•Long ago when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft. Today, it's called golf.
←Rate |
02-05-2010 18:46 by cj
Comments (0)
•You know you are getting old when everything either dries up or leaks.
←Rate |
02-05-2010 18:45
Comments (0)
•When I'm feeling down, I like to whistle. It makes the neighbor's dog run to the end of his chain and gag himself.
←Rate |
02-05-2010 18:45 by cj
Comments (0)