Funny Status Messages and Tweets

Funny status message updates for FaceBook or Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.

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   messageicon has decided that when I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep -- not screaming, like the passengers in his car
←Rate | 04-05-2009 20:46 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon a serial status changer....
←Rate | 04-05-2009 20:20 Comments (0)  


   messageicon now available with a bonus DVD; containing deleted scenes and 2 theatrical trailers
←Rate | 04-05-2009 05:26 Comments (0)  


   messageicon a Great source of Protein
←Rate | 04-04-2009 21:33 by Vaziri Comments (0)  


   messageicon trying to wipe with plastic wrap.
←Rate | 04-04-2009 21:12 Comments (0)  


   messageicon My Love Life is currently like NCAA mens Basketball, Its down to the FINAL FOUR! But My Wife has the homecourt Advantage!
←Rate | 04-04-2009 07:33 Comments (0)  


   messageicon just once, wants to hear Bob The Builder say "Can we build it?! No, were f*cked!!"
←Rate | 04-03-2009 21:52 Comments (0)  


   messageicon compulsively obsessed with OCD
←Rate | 04-03-2009 19:52 Comments (0)  


   messageicon if nothing goes right.... go left!
←Rate | 04-03-2009 19:24 Comments (0)  


   messageicon silence is gloden, but duct tape is silver.
←Rate | 04-03-2009 10:34 by Katherine Comments (0)  


   messageicon doesn't make mistakes, she dates them
←Rate | 04-02-2009 20:47 Comments (0)  


   messageicon amazed at the alarming drop-out rate of sky diving classes
←Rate | 04-02-2009 17:10 Comments (0)  


   messageicon the alpha and omega....
←Rate | 04-02-2009 08:32 by Peebs Comments (0)  


   messageicon may contain nuts.
←Rate | 04-02-2009 04:55 Comments (0)  


   messageicon happier than a redneck driving a racecar
←Rate | 04-01-2009 23:11 by Xlax421 Comments (0)  


   messageicon not FDA approved yet
←Rate | 04-01-2009 23:06 Comments (0)  


   messageicon wondering when will he ever learn the answer to lifes problems arent at the bottom of a bottle, theyre on facebook!!!!!
←Rate | 04-01-2009 22:20 Comments (0)  


   messageicon found Wonka's last golden ticket!
←Rate | 04-01-2009 20:35 by Nikki Comments (0)  


   messageicon divulging his mind in the complexities of th... oooh look a kitty!
←Rate | 04-01-2009 11:06 by Ryan Comments (0)  


   messageicon used to have super powers but the psychiatrist took them all away.
←Rate | 04-01-2009 11:03 by Ryan Comments (1)  



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