Funny Status Messages

   For my assignment to do a paper on Nihilism, I turned in a beige unruled blank page with my name on it. When I got a "C" I could FEEL the irony. Then I found out EVERYBODY got "C"s. Well played, professor.

   So umm.....Friday. I've been waiting for a while now wondering watcha waiting for?? Rebecca is not gonna introduce you every week now c'mon!

   I get so tired of the same old BS...can't I get a little BS variety?

   Girls 'round here have kissed so many frogs, they're starting to look like tadpoles. Attractive?! Probably to a water snake or a dragonfly!

   Uncle Luke is running for Mayor of Miami... (no punch line..its funny enough!)

   Rory's got a Tiger on his ass and he lookin like a Wildebeest!!

   imogen thomas been paid to do giggs in manchester she cant wait

   will never be able to enjoy a nice chianti again thanks to Hannibal Lechter. He totally fuched it up for me.

   None of the other vitamins compare to the first, fluffy, white one on the top.

   Click Filter On or Off To See This Status.

   given permission to get her B#T#& on. I am really looking forward to tomorrow.

   reminds Arsenalaction of Blair's so-called “deal in the desert” in March 2004 with a famously cheesy handshake with Col Gaddafi...you ass.

   I can't decide if this thick orange sky color over New York is beautiful or too close to a chemical attack of some sort.

   Tell me then, does love make one a fool or do only fools fall in love?

   Back in the day. How long did it take people to catch on and realize that the one guy who implemented putting up his middle finger meant "fvck you"

   Congrats on ur Bar Mitzvah. Today you r a man, which you'll now illustrate by going apes*** over presents.

   Facebook is like women: when you think you have it all figured out, it completely changes.

   Stupidity is not an inherited trait, but for some it comes quite naturally.

   Aaaaaahhhhhh.....Friday.....time for the Beer-Goggle Olympics. But be careful single peeps, 'cuz once the sun comes up, you COULD find yourself in a bad horror movie. WHOOP!! Have a GREAT weekend!!

   Women are the reason for reasons.