This just in, Paul the octopus is dead. Paul was "asked" if Farve was going to stay retired. Witnesses report that Paul changed color's rapidly, vibrated slightly and then exploded.
Him: "A wizard is never late, babe. Nor is he early. He arrives precisely when he means to." Her: "You're not fooling anyone, that was premature ejaculation and you know it."
2 doctors are laying in bed after having sex.Guy says "You must be an gyno' because you can work that p*ssy." The woman says "You must be an anesthesiologist because I didn't feel a thing."
You know the women that say: "Why are hot guys always jerks, the nice guys always taken, and the hot and nice guys always gay?" You're fat. Stop making f*cking excuses.