father OR dad Funny Status Messages

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   messageicon To all those that use our competitors brand...Happy Father's Day From the people of Durex
←Rate | 06-18-2011 18:53 Comments (0)  

   messageicon To all the women I've dated. If we have a secret love child together that you never told me about, just have them get me a giftcard for Father's Day. Thanks!
←Rate | 06-18-2011 20:06 by @Nunthewizr Comments (0)  

   messageicon Father's Day always worries me. I'm afraid I'll get a gift I can't afford.
←Rate | 06-18-2011 22:58 by markmc1965 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Nowadays, Father's Day is a good day to thank Dad for not running away from home.
←Rate | 06-18-2011 22:59 by markmc1965 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Speaking of Fathers Day... The one thing you never wanna hear when your father catches you watching porn is... "Scoot over."
←Rate | 06-18-2011 23:45 by SteveOH Comments (0)  

   messageicon For all of you Dads out there who went out for milk, and actually came back home -- HAPPY FATHER'S DAY......
←Rate | 06-19-2011 00:30 by sully Comments (0)  

   messageicon My father taught me a lot of things, however, the most important thing he taught me was how to be a great dad. A close second is how to have a conversation with someone for a half an hour even though you can't remember their name or anything else
←Rate | 06-19-2011 06:04 by flinnie Comments (0)  

   messageicon Father's Day Then And Now: In 1911, fathers prayed their children would learn English. Today, fathers pray their children will speak English.
←Rate | 06-19-2011 07:56 Comments (0)  

   messageicon would like to thank maury povich for letting so many know if they are the father and can celebrate this day
←Rate | 06-19-2011 09:13 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Nothing says Happy Father's Day like waking up next to a stripper and wondering if she actually has a father to celebrate the day.
←Rate | 06-19-2011 11:49 by @demiroquai Comments (0)  

   messageicon I was chillin' with my buddy and his wife walked in and said, "Happy Father's Day! You're so much more than the guy who used to buy dollar store condoms."
←Rate | 06-19-2011 12:47 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  

   messageicon Happy Father's Day Dad! Whoever you are...
←Rate | 06-19-2011 12:49 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  

   messageicon If you're lucky enough to still have a dad the best Father's Day gift would be to call the guy and ask his advice about something. Anything.
←Rate | 06-19-2011 13:03 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  

   messageicon Happy father day to the men in our lives that have made a diffrence when we didnt have one to be there.., our uncles, brothers, grandfathers teachers bosses,step dads...you didnt have to be there, but we were all grateful you were.
←Rate | 06-19-2011 13:44 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Let's not forget a Happy Father's day to all the Sugar Daddies out there.
←Rate | 06-19-2011 14:08 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Happy Father's Day, all! Be nice to your dad today. Remember it's because of him not pulling out in time that you're alive today!
←Rate | 06-19-2011 15:57 by biggie Comments (0)  

   messageicon Father's Day is the most confusing day in the Ghetto !!!
←Rate | 06-20-2011 08:16 by Matt Comments (0)  

   messageicon Really!!! Kim Kardashian is upset with the Casey Anthony verdict!!! Your father defended OJ Simpson, Thus starting the Kardashian tradition of getting black men off!!!
←Rate | 07-07-2011 09:40 by migasjoe Comments (1)  

   messageicon I'm looking forward to the day when Jesus points to me, and turns to our Father and says, "This one is mine!"
←Rate | 07-07-2011 14:07 Comments (0)  

   messageicon I'm not your Father but I can be your friend ( Heavy breathing ) - Step-dad Darth Vader
←Rate | 07-09-2011 02:48 by @trav_is_lindsay Comments (0)  

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