love Funny Status Messages

   Pro tip: Fall in love with someone who will treat you how Kanye treats Kanye.

   This Friday, Finding Dory will be release in theaters as well as Season 4 of Orange is the new Black on Netflix. One is about the adventures of a lost soul in a sea of fish searching for love. The other is made by Pixar.

   When I'm bored I like going to down to the train station, making eye contact with someone as the train pulls away and then chase after it while yelling "I LOVE YOU!"

   Don't listen to Billy Joel's piano man. It turns out that making love to your Tonic & Gin will get you thrown out of the bar.

   Remember how you used to love getting all new school supplies and now you just steal them from the office?

   There is always some madness in love. But there is also always some reason in madness.

   You'll know it's real if I still love you when I'm sober!

   you know I love you like a fat kid loves cake.. But i'm on a diet

   Arnold Schwarzenegger was asked if he wanted to upgrade to Windows 7. He replied "I still love Vista, baby".

   If two past lovers remain friends, it`s either someone is still in love, or someone is still hoping for a second chance.

   Losing someone you love so much is painful but losing yourself in the process of loving someone too much is the worst.

   Chicken pot pie.... the three things I love the most

   Another year about to be in the past ~ a few ups & downs ~ some you remember ~ some you forget ~ New Year ahead ~ Dreams to Collect ~ I wish you all a New Year that is full of happy times, great memories, good health, contentment, and most of all LOVE ♥

   Make love, not war. Hell, do both, GET MARRIED!

   I love the holidays. A time when people are supposed to be more nice and caring, actually become bigger a$$holes than they are the rest of the year.

   I've outsourced my LIKES, Birthday wishes and comments on your post and pics to a firm in India. So if Sanjay isn't showing you enough love, please let me know right away.

   There has been a surge in patriotism. These terrorists haven't learned a damn thing. They just don't get it. If they piss off Americans (as they have) our love of country and eventually our wrath will be nothing but awesome.

   If you love me, let me know. If not, please take the $20 and finish the job.

   I love you so much that there's almost no chance I'd use you as a human shield against a Navy SEAL'S attack.

   I love cornbread. Not as much as the woman next to me who has "CORNBREAD" tattooed on her arm... but I love it nonetheless.