Funny Status Messages and Tweets

Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.

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   messageicon Wondering why The Muppets have large protruding eyes. But then again, I realised that if I had a hand up my bum, my eyes would probably protrude too.
←Rate | 09-03-2010 12:30 by @XxBubbleJuicexX Comments (0)  


   messageicon I believe in looking out for number one. Especially if the dog's not housetrained.
←Rate | 09-12-2010 11:28 by Aaron Comments (0)  


   messageicon I get ENOUGH exercise pushing my luck! ;)
←Rate | 09-15-2010 15:59 by Heather26 Comments (1)  


   messageicon Why are some parents hypocritical..."don't lie to me or I'll tell SAnta on you"
←Rate | 09-21-2010 02:55 by Eddy Comments (0)  


   messageicon Old enough to know better. Young enough not to care!
←Rate | 09-24-2010 17:26 by prkrngr27 Comments (0)  


   messageicon if stupidity was music you would be a one man band!!!
←Rate | 09-29-2010 17:19 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm about as motivated as a Denny's employee.
←Rate | 10-11-2010 14:32 by Marshall the Great Comments (1)  


   messageicon Having it all together is not my style.
←Rate | 10-11-2010 14:35 by Marshall the Great Comments (1)  


   messageicon Ability is a good thing but stability is even better.
←Rate | 10-19-2010 02:13 by PL Comments (0)  


   messageicon Car sickness is the feeling you get when the monthly car payment is due..
←Rate | 06-29-2010 08:43 Comments (0)  


   messageicon where there is a Will,there are 500 relatives!
←Rate | 07-01-2010 22:36 Comments (0)  


   messageicon best all time combos...peanut butter and jelly, ham and cheese, batman and robin...ALCOHOL AND FIREWORKS!
←Rate | 07-04-2010 18:06 Comments (0)  


   messageicon "You shouldn't compare yourself to others they are more screwed up than you think."
←Rate | 07-14-2010 16:28 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Computer games don't effect kids, I mean if Pac-Man affected kids, we'll all be around darkened rooms munching magic pills, listening to repetitive electronic music.
←Rate | 07-23-2010 00:45 by savio Comments (0)  


   messageicon My definition of urgent and yours must be different. Answer this, IS IT ON FIRE?
←Rate | 07-30-2010 14:58 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I may have been born without the "wait, you shouldn't do that!" gene.
←Rate | 07-31-2010 11:10 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Brett Favre retired today, I'm not Worried about it too much. It's kinda like when Snoop Dog quit's weed. It really means nothing."
←Rate | 08-03-2010 11:20 by Dylan Bosch Comments (0)  


   messageicon a true smarta$$ and can be quite b*tchy at times too - but it's my natural defense against stupidity!
←Rate | 08-05-2010 08:43 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I was watching 20/20 and they had a feature called "Bait Car" where people attempt to steal the car but the doors lock and the engine shuts off. I wonder if they sell a "Date Car?"
←Rate | 08-19-2010 22:46 Comments (1)  


   messageicon Does running out of money count as exercise?
←Rate | 06-29-2013 09:42 by Griff Comments (0)  




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