MWC Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Whew! Thank you warning label I was actually considering using my new floor lamp in the shower.
←Rate | 03-05-2013 11:17 by MWC Comments (0)  


   messageicon Now that the Confederate Flag has been removed that will stop all of the hate and murders in this country
←Rate | 07-10-2015 11:36 by MWC Comments (0)  


   messageicon A woman can only run as fast as her boobs let her!
←Rate | 06-01-2015 15:59 by MWC Comments (0)  


   messageicon So, all theses years I thought it was the dyer making my shirts not fit. now I'm pretty sure it the refrigerator.
←Rate | 04-16-2014 06:58 by MWC Comments (0)  


   messageicon My Hamster passed today, he fell asleep at the wheel....
←Rate | 10-15-2012 11:50 by MWC Comments (0)  


   messageicon If I had 10 nutter butter cookies and you took 5 away, what would you have...That's right, a black eye an a broke hand!
←Rate | 11-01-2012 22:04 by MWC Comments (0)  


   messageicon It just dawned on me why Mayberry was so peaceful and quit, cause nobody was married. Andy, Aunt Bea, Barney, Floyd, Howard, Goober, Gomer, Sam, Ernest T Bass, The Darlins, Helen, Thelma Lou, Clara. The only one married was Otis, and he stayed drunk!
←Rate | 07-04-2015 19:49 by MWC Comments (0)  


   messageicon Fergison Mo. BLACK FRIDAY GHETTO STYLE!!!!
←Rate | 11-25-2014 08:11 by MWC Comments (0)  


   messageicon 30 years ago my wife got a tattoo of a horse head on her boob, it now looks like a giraffe
←Rate | 10-10-2012 14:47 by MWC Comments (0)  


   messageicon Ladies, when it comes to doggy style.....I'm behind you 100%
←Rate | 01-26-2015 15:18 by MWC Comments (0)  


   messageicon They should put Harriet Tubman on the EBT card instead
←Rate | 04-22-2016 15:52 by MWC Comments (0)  


   messageicon People who say "If I disappeared, no one would notice" are wrong. If I saw someone vanish right in front of me I would FREAK OUT!
←Rate | 03-14-2013 09:19 by MWC Comments (0)  


   messageicon Oh and for all those polar bears are losing their homes because the earth is heating up people ..Tell the polar bears to bring their furry asses to Indiana they will feel right at home
←Rate | 11-19-2014 08:02 by MWC Comments (0)  


   messageicon went to a shrink today. she says I have a split personality. Charged me 84.00. I paid her 42.00 and told her to get the rest from the other bi tch!
←Rate | 01-21-2013 09:16 by MWC Comments (0)  


   messageicon Starbuck really isn't that expensive, compared to what Victoria Secret charges per cup.
←Rate | 10-07-2012 11:48 by MWC Comments (0)  


   messageicon "‎"when I was a kid, I was terrified of ear wigs cause I thought they came outta your ears. just imagine when I found out about cockroaches!""
←Rate | 10-21-2012 23:52 by MWC Comments (0)  


   messageicon Remember ladies; When men give women roses they expect Tulips in return.
←Rate | 02-13-2013 08:08 by MWC Comments (0)  


   messageicon As I get older I spend a lot more time thinking about the hereafter. Every time I enter a room, I have to stop and say, "Now what am I here after?"
←Rate | 05-23-2013 15:23 by MWC Comments (0)  


   messageicon Women don't like being told what to do unless they're naked.
←Rate | 09-09-2012 15:54 by MWC Comments (0)  


   messageicon Last night I lost my mood ring....I'm not sure how I feel about that.
←Rate | 03-02-2016 05:32 by MWC Comments (0)  



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