snow OR flurries OR winter Funny Status Messages
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people talk about working on their "summer body" but I've been working on my winter body for years
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08-27-2019 21:22 by Eddy
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Finally, my winter fat is gone, now all I have are spring rolls
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04-17-2019 07:22
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Just got done knockin boots! Alright fine, I just used a broom to brush the snow off of my sandals...
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02-17-2019 17:22 by JohnY
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it true atheist children lie down and make snow corpses
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02-12-2019 13:32 by Zinc
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Some of you ladies have more inches of snow outside than your man has in his pants.
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02-11-2019 10:54 by RyanRyan
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Coldest winter weather in recorded history. In two short years the President has fixed global warming.
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02-01-2019 07:52
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am I watching The Weather Channel or Game of Thrones? it looks like winter is coming
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01-28-2019 08:04 by Eddy
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Oh, the weather outside can bite me. My car won't start to spite me. I can't feel my freakin' toes. Winter blows, Winter blows, Winter blows.
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12-15-2018 00:21 by JeffW
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I know winter has started when my neighbor returns my rake, and borrows my snow shovel .
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12-05-2018 14:50 by Joker
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An apple a day is bull crap.... Apples are dangerous. Just look at Eve, Snow White, Blackberry or any pig at a luau.
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07-21-2018 18:42 by BobbyT
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Its still winter because Mother Nature saw all our summer bodies and decided we weren't ready yet.

Plan to change the air in your tires soon. Replace that winter air in your tires for best inflation during summer months. Most mechanics will do this for you for free on April 1st.
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03-17-2018 11:04
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Driving a gray car in the winter is putting a lot of faith in your fellow drivers on the road.
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03-10-2018 09:19
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"We be bobsleddin'." The Winter Olympics Bobsled Team

So irritating that my kid gets a text to tell him school is closed for snow day. He should have to stare at the news channel crawl for 45 minutes like I did
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01-18-2018 21:05
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Winter storm named Grayson sounds like it should be wearing a tweed jacket
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01-06-2018 02:44
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One good thing about this winter snow storm, is it makes my lawn look as good as my neighbors.

So cold don's toupee flew south for the winter
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01-02-2018 03:23 by Jake
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Lefties eat yellow snow on Winter Solstice.
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12-25-2017 14:17
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I must be getting old. Since when does 2 to 4 inches of snow become a winter storm warning? Back when I was a kid, we just called flurries, and we complained it wasn't enough to even have a good snowball fight, let along close schools.
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