snow OR flurries OR winter Funny Status Messages

   people talk about working on their "summer body" but I've been working on my winter body for years

   Finally, my winter fat is gone, now all I have are spring rolls

   Just got done knockin boots! Alright fine, I just used a broom to brush the snow off of my sandals...

   it true atheist children lie down and make snow corpses

   Some of you ladies have more inches of snow outside than your man has in his pants.

   Coldest winter weather in recorded history. In two short years the President has fixed global warming.

   am I watching The Weather Channel or Game of Thrones? it looks like winter is coming

   Oh, the weather outside can bite me. My car won't start to spite me. I can't feel my freakin' toes. Winter blows, Winter blows, Winter blows.

   I know winter has started when my neighbor returns my rake, and borrows my snow shovel .

   An apple a day is bull crap.... Apples are dangerous. Just look at Eve, Snow White, Blackberry or any pig at a luau.

   Its still winter because Mother Nature saw all our summer bodies and decided we weren't ready yet.

   Plan to change the air in your tires soon. Replace that winter air in your tires for best inflation during summer months. Most mechanics will do this for you for free on April 1st.

   Driving a gray car in the winter is putting a lot of faith in your fellow drivers on the road.

   "We be bobsleddin'." The Winter Olympics Bobsled Team

   So irritating that my kid gets a text to tell him school is closed for snow day. He should have to stare at the news channel crawl for 45 minutes like I did

   Winter storm named Grayson sounds like it should be wearing a tweed jacket

   One good thing about this winter snow storm, is it makes my lawn look as good as my neighbors.

   So cold don's toupee flew south for the winter

   Lefties eat yellow snow on Winter Solstice.

   I must be getting old. Since when does 2 to 4 inches of snow become a winter storm warning? Back when I was a kid, we just called flurries, and we complained it wasn't enough to even have a good snowball fight, let along close schools.