eaglet1122 Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon I had a serious talk with my crew supervisor today, because nobody showed up for work. I told him we needed to let ONE go not JUAN...
←Rate | 11-14-2010 17:55 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon You should not clean a gun while loaded....Unless you're wiping off fingerprints!!
←Rate | 11-14-2010 19:24 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I think it is funny as hell. Then again I love my own brand of comedy!!
←Rate | 11-14-2010 19:27 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I may not be an organ donor, but I owe it to mankind to donate my humor to science!
←Rate | 11-30-2010 07:17 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I make, picking up my dry cleaning, look like a drug deal. That way people always wonder what I am laundering!
←Rate | 12-03-2010 06:08 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon #1-900 I used to like to talk to you on late Friday nights when all my friends were out with their girls. Then you went and raise your rates!
←Rate | 12-09-2010 09:36 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon #1 I am sorry to break this to you baby but you are not #1. you are not even #10. To be honest I don't think you even made the speed dial list! However, you will always be my favorite Grandma!
←Rate | 12-09-2010 09:41 by eaglet1122 Comments (1)  


   messageicon I am 100% certain that Band Camp enrollment went up by a third after the movie American Pie! Thanks Stiffler!!
←Rate | 12-28-2010 23:10 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Word of advice, Saying "Nice Hand" at an amputee poker fund raiser is NOT a good idea!
←Rate | 12-28-2010 23:48 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon OK, I just throughly cleaned out my truck from being on the road for 2 months working. What did I learn: 1) I should lay off the dollar menu 2) If TV series Hoarders, did a car edition they would ask me to star and 3) I am now getting 7 mpg more with all
←Rate | 01-09-2011 17:59 by eaglet1122 Comments (2)  


   messageicon What makes me so funny? My strict diet of sunshine and unicorn meat!
←Rate | 01-11-2011 15:04 by eaglet1122 Comments (1)  


   messageicon Sometimes, in my world 2+2=5 because I like to add a little extra to make it interesting.
←Rate | 01-20-2011 13:49 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Doughboy is survived by his wife Play Dough, three children: John Dough, Jane Dough and Dosey Dough, plus they had one in the oven. He is also survived by his elderly father, Pop Tart. The funeral was held at 3:50 for about 20 minutes.
←Rate | 02-03-2011 16:32 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon My dentist is smoking hot! I always ask for the lead vest, even though I don't need an X-Ray!
←Rate | 02-03-2011 16:49 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I am most like a mushroom. I am a fungi!
←Rate | 02-05-2011 01:50 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon OMG! I just had a full grown GOOSE poop on my windshield! Looks like I just got egged. Go back to Canada!
←Rate | 02-12-2011 15:44 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon STALKERS meeting tonight at that secret spot! You know the one!!
←Rate | 02-12-2011 17:59 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon When things in your life don't add up, use math. It solves problems!
←Rate | 02-16-2011 21:58 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Facebook Poking Hours: Mon-Friday 7am-10pm Sat 12-11pm Sun Closed
←Rate | 02-21-2011 08:53 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon She was gone as fast as rum cake at an AA meeting!
←Rate | 02-26-2011 17:36 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  



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