snow OR flurries OR winter Funny Status Messages

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   messageicon starin at a fluorescent light Above him watchin the dust bunny fall like snow.
←Rate | 10-19-2011 19:35 by X Comments (0)  

   messageicon Snow white lived with all those men & didn't once do any "favors" to get out of housework? Now THAT's a fairy tale.
←Rate | 10-18-2011 09:55 by SuthernFukr Comments (0)  

   messageicon Science Schmience. I think they've got it backwards. Birds don't fly south for the winter, they fly north for the summer. Nyah!
←Rate | 10-10-2011 20:10 by MC Bird Brain Comments (0)  

   messageicon Me? Behave? Seriously... As a child I saw Tarzan strolling naked. Cinderella arrived home after midnight. Pinocchio told lies. Aladdin was a thief. Batman drove over 200 miles an hour. Snow White lived in a house with 7 men. It's not my fault!
←Rate | 09-06-2011 16:22 Comments (0)  

   messageicon two young boys are lying in a snow bank outside of church with their pants down. when asked what they were doing they said "father likes a couple cold ones before mass begins"
←Rate | 08-21-2011 16:37 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Drinking and driving is twice the fun in the snow
←Rate | 08-09-2011 16:13 by jdirt Comments (0)  

   messageicon You expect kids to behave when tarzan lives half naked, cinderella comes home midnight, Pinocchio lies all the time, Aladdin is king of thieves, Batman drives at 200mph, sleeping Beauty is lazy & snow white lives with 7 guys?
←Rate | 08-06-2011 01:51 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Why don't they air "Shark week" in the winter when we all don't care about swimming?
←Rate | 08-02-2011 00:38 Comments (0)  

   messageicon I'm watching for anyone complaining about the heat. I will copy your post and save it for winter. Then I WILL paste it to your profile with WHO IS HOT NOW when you are buried snow. OH you know who you are!
←Rate | 07-21-2011 17:48 by shoesan Comments (0)  

   messageicon This year I broke ties with Winter, She was pretty mad and told Summer about me. So our relationship has benn stormy and a little chilly at times.
←Rate | 06-27-2011 10:56 Comments (0)  

   messageicon My "We had to walk 5 miles uphill in the snow just to get to school" story will be about it taking 4 hours to download an mp3 with a 28k modem in 1995.
←Rate | 06-12-2011 18:02 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  

   messageicon What I hate most about winter is people coming to bed and touching me their ice cold toes. I know you got your sexy on, but for god's sake wear some socks.
←Rate | 06-09-2011 15:53 Comments (0)  

   messageicon I keep forgetting the rules. When Jesus doesn't show up, is that 6 more weeks of winter?
←Rate | 05-23-2011 12:48 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Dear Parents, How do you expect kids to listen to you when: Tarzan lives half naked. Cinderella comes back at midnight. Pinocchio lies all the time. Aladdin is the king of thieves. Batman drives at 320km/h. Sleeping beauty is lazy. Snow white sleeps with
←Rate | 04-23-2011 09:59 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Telling your kids you remember when gas was $.99 is like your Grandparents telling you they remember walking to school in the snow barefooted... Both were a long long time ago & will never happen again...
←Rate | 04-14-2011 09:22 Comments (0)  

   messageicon tellin the snow to "GET OF MY LAWNN"
←Rate | 04-06-2011 20:55 by Jamin Comments (0)  

   messageicon Either Mother Nature had one of the best pranks in history for April Fools by saying that we were getting 7 inches of snow today or our weather men are just plain retarded! Either way....well played!
←Rate | 04-01-2011 13:28 by Massena43 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Punxutawney Phil came back out today and wrote a message in the snow. It said, "April Fools!!" Looks like Ground Hog season is starting early this year.. Lock and load!
←Rate | 04-01-2011 12:39 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Punxutawney Phil came back out today and wrote a message in the snow. It said, "April Fools!!"
←Rate | 04-01-2011 09:35 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Winter: It's like the crazy murderer in a horror movie. Just when you think it's dead, it strikes one last time.
←Rate | 03-28-2011 15:00 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  

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