love Funny Status Messages

   I love watching all the fish in my tank suck in the same piece of fish shi t and then spitting it out, thinking it was food.

   I’d love to have a s*x change. Preferably from none to absolutely sh*tloads

   Kanye West is being sued by a woman who claims to have given birth to his love child. Kanye took it all in stride, however, since he has a history of being in "arrears" with other women

   I love your personality!!! Especially when your not talking is my favorite!!! JW

   Relationships must be chosen wisely. It's better to be alone than to be in bad company. If something is meant to be, it will happen – in the right time, with the right person, and for the best reason.'Fall in love when you're ready,not when you're

   They say you never know what you have till you lose it, You promise your girl something you better do it, You can't tell a woman you love her are you stupid, Words don't express you love you got to prove it

   Sometimes when drunk I sleep in a ditch. Doesn’t make me love my bed any less. Actually makes me love it more. See? Cheating isn’t evil.

   I love to put a box of cheerios in the mouth of the loved one that snores everynight

   Saying "I fell in love with a dictator" is something I will never say in my life.

   I wish I loved anything as much as yankees love fireworks. #nojobbutcanaffordfireworks

   The only thing worse than a broken heart is a heart that has never known love.

   We men love two women; the one is the creation of our imagination and the other is not yet born.

   I don't know why people see a stutter as being a negative thing. I love people with stutters. It's like they're giving you a drum roll before they start talking.

   I love to walk in fog , so nobody knows am smoking (̅_̅_̅_̅(̅_̅_̅_̅_̅_̅_̅_̅_̅̅_̅()ڪے~ ~

   ♫So I'm shaving all my love.....Yeah I'm shaving all my lovin'...Yes I'm shaving all my love for you ♫

   If two people love each other nothing is impossible. Except deciding where to eat.

   I love contactless delivery. They just throw the slop at your door and I run out like a little pig.

   Always make love with your eyes open, and never forget to use your tongue when you kiss.

   commercial: get one diamond for your best friend, and one for your true love me: why would my dog want a diamond

   Love is so sweet makes my heart beat ...My heart skip a beat