santa AND presents AND christmas AND xmas AND holidays AND elfs Funny Status Messages

   Are the people that leave their Christmas lights on the house and just turn them on in December smart or just plain lazy??

   A man basically goes through three phases in his life... He believes in Santa Claus...He doesn't believe in Santa Claus...He is Santa Claus.

   already on the naughty list. Santa... I can explain.

   I wonder if I tell my kids I'm calling Santa, will work after Christmas too!

   I'm having a Deja vu of Christmas posts

   Since you're asking....I want a mistletoe belt buckle for Christmas.

   Don't you find those people who keep updating how many days to christmas annoying? Anyway it's 37 days to christmas.

   I just got my wifes Christmas gift. I hid it in the oven. She will never find it there!

   says This Christmas, let's put misteltoe in our back pockets so all the people who hate us can kiss our..."

   ...just heard that Tampax is replacing the strings with tinsel this month. ...Ladies, get them soon, supplies only last for the Christmas period!"

   may not be the real Santa, but that doesn't mean I haven't seen you while you're sleeping."

   Dear Santa, Don't bother coming to my house this year. I've been naughty and it was f*cking worth it, you judgemental son of a b*tch!"

   Dear Santa.... All I want is access to that "bad boy's" list of yours.

   Why are you informing me how many shopping days left until Christmas? I'm not getting anything for you anyway!

   if you are posting how many days there are until Christmas in November, you should have to do all the dishes after Thanksgiving dinner.

   my neighbors put their Christmas decorations up early, so I put my Easter stuff out just to one-up them.

   Oh yes Gwyneth Paltrow, you are so very country strong. I guess being born in LA, going to private school NYC and attending college in Santa Barbara really prepared ya.

   Wow, Christmas parties invitations are starting to arrive... grrrr... shut up liver!

   Every year Santa runs over Grandma with his Reindeer. I wonder if I give him extra cookies if he would aim for my ex wife this year instead?

   The Christmas cheer has begun.... American Express commercials just announced if you use their card ...they'll donate ONE SHINY PENNY to charity...... is there any way to spend LESS,,,, nice JOB AMEX