love Funny Status Messages

   Was it wrong to wear a "I love happy endings" t-shirt to massage envy?

   Sex might satisfy, food might fuel, love might sustain, but without booze, what is the point?

   I love cooking for my man because it makes me feel both independent and oppressed at the same time.

   Love doesn't need to be perfect, it just needs to be true.

   I would love to agree with you, but there is no point in both of us being wrong.

   I love when you go to get a massage and they ask you where it hurts and you start crying cause it's your entire existence.

   Being in love is the smartest way of being stupid.

   Oh, the things I do for love...like lie to the police concerning my whereabouts the night of August 4th...

   As of today, I've been married to my best friend for 10 amazing years. Love you, sweetie! Is she gone? OMG, you guys, I'm being smothered.

   It's really very simple; I will love you unconditionally as long as you just do everything I say.

   Dear sleep, I know we had problems when I was younger, but now I love you.

   Do what you love, but run like hell as soon as you hear the sirens.

   I wish I loved anything as much as people in yogurt commercials love eating yogurt.

   I love wanking in the shower but I've been told that if I do it again, they're gonna revoke my gym membership.

   If Facebook has proved ANYTHING, it's that the love of your life is someone you've never actually met.

   so youre looking for a good guy who will love and respect you, but yet you post half naked pics on your fb? why thats. .thats brilliant!

   I love morning sex....... Ok I love it anytime.

   I love it when you push my buttons, baby. But touch my car radio presets and I'll have to push you into oncoming traffic.

   Her: Do You know how much I love you? Me: how much? Her: This much *spreads legs*

   I Love when my Friends help to Identify themselves as Technologically-Retarded Idiots by changing their Status to: "WOW I cant believe that you can see who is viewing your Profile!"...