life Funny Status Messages

   The way you're bashing your laptop keyboard is how your life is going.

   The way you're bashing your laptop keyboard is the way your life is going.

   When life gives you lemons, make lemonade. Then sell it and use the profits to by a gun. See if life makes the same mistake twice.

   I'm beginning to think that my destiny in life is just to be a bad example that other people can learn from.

   When Life gives you lemons, consider purchasing a different cereal.

   It’s all fun & games until feelings & emotions get involved then it becomes life.

   I live by my father's motto: "Life is a football game. Try to fall asleep in the first quarter and complain if anyone shuts off the TV."

   5 Stages of Life: 1. Just a kid. 2. Don’t want to be a kid. 3. Afraid you’re still a kid. 4. Definitely not a kid. 5. Wish you were a kid.

   Make sure the important people in your life know how important they are before it’s too late.

   Even if you live your life as a open book, people will still wonder which pages have secret messages.

   I would rather be known in life as a honest sinner than as a lying hypocrite.

   I've had plenty of money throughout my life that I could have become an alcoholic. but I choose to invested in agriculture by smoking Marijuana. . .

   Why is it that the most interesting things in life usually aren't in our best interest?

   The worst thing in life is smiling at someone who doesn't even worth a kick in the crotch.

   Has anyone ever encountered a semi-stranger barefaced freeloader in their life?

   Hey negative people; The only thing I want negative in my life are pregnancy tests.

   Does anyone else ever feel like life is a relay race and your paycheck is the baton?

   It seems like Mark Zuckerberg is playing real life Monopoly. He owns FB, Instagram now WhatsApp...what's next, Twitter?

   ATTENTION : All position for stupid people in my life ,have been filled ,no more applicants need apply. Thank You !

   Valentine Day weekend is over. I think Helen Keller plays the role of cupid in my love life.