Funny Status Messages



Sort:  Recent   |  Oldest  |  Rating


Search Messages:
Page: 5245 of 6446

   messageicon If you really need to set aside one day a year to show your "love" then obviously that person doesn't mean much to you
←Rate | 02-13-2011 17:45 Comments (0)  


   messageicon a valentines day nonbeliever!!!
←Rate | 02-13-2011 17:43 by Chicka who thinks vday is pointless Comments (0)  


   messageicon I get fewer Valentines than Christmas cards. ....I got one Christmas card
←Rate | 02-13-2011 17:28 by @Jimboleem Comments (0)  


   messageicon Love is in the air..... Good thing I have my gas mask on xD
←Rate | 02-13-2011 17:14 by Sal Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just think, the one for you is walking the earth right now! Probably in a Wall-Mart somewhere!
←Rate | 02-13-2011 17:13 by Wolf Comments (0)  


   messageicon was stopped outside BOOTS chemist by a woman with a clipboard who asked "Can I ask you what products you use for grooming" you should have seen the look on her face when I replied "Sure... Haribo Sweets, Internet Chatrooms and a Small Puppy"
←Rate | 02-13-2011 17:02 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just moved the dog's bed to vacuum underneath and found a stack of pics of people's legs.
←Rate | 02-13-2011 16:11 by Aaron Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just think, the one for you is walking the earth right now! Probably in a zoo somewhere
←Rate | 02-13-2011 16:10 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Tell your friends that the F5 key puts photos back the way they were on facebook:)
←Rate | 02-13-2011 15:19 Comments (0)  


   messageicon V-day trick: Put a "I belong to (your name)" keychain in a ring box from Kay's and give it to your girlfriend. She will love it!
←Rate | 02-13-2011 13:38 Comments (0)  


   messageicon 127 Hours would have been better if immediately after he cut off his arm the rock shifted and landed on his foot.
←Rate | 02-13-2011 13:02 by @Jimboleem Comments (0)  


   messageicon 127 Hours would have been better if immediately after he cut off his arm the rock shifted and landed on his foot.
←Rate | 02-13-2011 12:22 by @Jimboleem Comments (0)  


   messageicon I really am glad those Egypt people got they freedom....But let a Mo Fo hit me with a rock and wez gonna have some problems....
←Rate | 02-13-2011 12:21 by bryan j brown Comments (0)  


   messageicon When you find someone who finally understands you, the world will go away.
←Rate | 02-13-2011 12:12 by Abbybaby34 Comments (0)  


   messageicon do not go to Jareds...he's creepy.   He had no diamonds....just a huge pair of jeans that smelled like sandwiches and folds and folds of SKIN!
←Rate | 02-13-2011 10:22 by @gnarleycharley Comments (0)  


   messageicon single for Valentine's again this year. I think my skin is the wrong color...women seem to like diamond skin now a days.
←Rate | 02-13-2011 10:14 Comments (0)  


   messageicon did not go to Jared. But did put my entire tax refund in my savings account again.
←Rate | 02-13-2011 09:59 Comments (0)  


   messageicon with in a minute, ____________ will be the first person to "like" this post because he is always on line and always is the first one.
←Rate | 02-13-2011 09:49 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sad truth: He goes to Jared, she goes to a pawn shop in about 7 years.
←Rate | 02-13-2011 09:29 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just in case you are wondering....I did not go to Jared.
←Rate | 02-13-2011 09:21 Comments (0)  




Submit your own funny facebook status message here:
Name:
Status Message:

... characters left