love Funny Status Messages

   Love is a two way street, but sometimes there's a car flipped over blocking both lanes of traffic.

   You can't buy a woman's love, but you can buy a human heart... Seriously, go look on Craigslist.

   I've lost love, money, and my mind on occasion, I don't care. But It would kill me if I lost the ability to laugh at myself.

   To this day it still upsets me that all of those times that Forest Gump was separated from his true love, he never ONCE thought to pick up a phone and dial 867-5309.......

   My gf thinks I cook our meals cause I love her. Really, it's cause I'm afraid she might try to poison me.

   I wish I loved anything as much as rappers love female dogs and gardening tools.

   Falling in love on the internet is a lot like running on a treadmill for an hour and expecting to be ANYWHERE else!

   I don't hate you, but I hope you fall in love and get married.

   Do you like the strong, silent type? Then you'll love my farts.

   You call it stalking, I call it stalking. SEE HOW MUCH WE HAVE IN COMMON WHY WON'T YOU LET ME LOVE YOU

   To those that manufacture and market tight, thin yoga pants to fit college girls; I love you man.

   Just because I constantly think of ways to make your life miserable doesn’t mean I don’t love you.

   I know he's not good for me. I think I love him. -women

   don't you just love those who have no education who spout their ridiculous uninformed views all over the place?

   On a scale of J ew to Floyd Mayweather, How much do you love money?

   I make my decisions like I make love. I don't, because I'm married.

   I'm more comfortable with animals than humans. Animals understand love clearly. Love a human and they misconstrue it a thousand ways.

   5 years ago I met my wife, the love of my life and my baby momma. It was awkward at first, but they all seem to be getting along now.

   I wished I loved anything as much as white folks love saying "gracias" in Mexican restaurants.

   If your boyfriend answers your text while playing Call of Duty, he doesn't love you. He just died on the game.