santa AND presents AND christmas AND xmas AND holidays AND elfs Funny Status Messages
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Watching Nightmare Before Christmas with a nice mug of wine and a bag of Doritos. This is the post-graduate life.
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12-01-2012 01:30
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When I was a kid I wrote to Santa Clause to "please send me a baby brother",,,,,,Santa wrote back "send me your mother"!
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11-29-2012 16:50
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Hey Holidays,,,, either start later or get more songs.
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11-27-2012 20:31 by snotty
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No matter how old you are, an empty Christmas wrapping paper tube is still a fun thing to bonk someone over the head with!
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11-27-2012 10:48 by MWC
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Know what I going to Buy to My MAYAN friend for Christmas.
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11-26-2012 20:48
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Next time I see a dead deer on the side of the road, I'm gonna leave and come back dressed as Santa with a sign that says "Help, need ride!"
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11-26-2012 10:34 by MWC
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I know what I'm getting all my Mayan friends for Christmas!
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11-25-2012 17:24 by snotty
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If I win $425 Million next Wednesday, what do you want for Christmas?
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11-25-2012 09:31
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Just remember this holiday season, if you say "May you kiss may ass" really fast, it sound just like "Merry Christmas"..
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11-24-2012 18:47
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I'd like to apologize for getting drunk and making an ass of myself at your Christmas party next week...
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11-23-2012 16:24
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I asked my wife what she wants for Christmas. She said, "Oh, nothing special." So I'm giving her a framed picture of her t!ts.
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11-23-2012 06:41
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saw a Mayan Xmas shopping today ........ seemed legit
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11-21-2012 21:59
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Black Friday... a special time to keep Capitalism in Christmas
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11-20-2012 22:33
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A stupid, ridiculous, sappy, eye-rolling Hallmark commercial just made me tear up...the holidays are officially here.
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11-20-2012 22:14
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I'm dreaming of a tight Christmas!
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11-20-2012 15:54
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What's a good Christmas gift for the woman who already has everything except morals?
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11-15-2012 13:01
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What's a good Christmas gift for the man who has everything except a clue?
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11-15-2012 12:30
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Tesco - It's the little things that make Christmas. Yeah, Vietnamese kids in sweat shops.
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11-15-2012 11:39
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I remember when Santa said I was to old to sit on his lap. Well that was last year, this year I am wearing a disguise.
So who's buying their kids Elmo toys this Christmas?....Anyone...?
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11-13-2012 19:55
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