friday OR weekend Funny Status Messages

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Instead of a tweet up, I think all the twitter crushes should get together for a weekend in the mountains You know... A Couples Retweet

←Rate | 08-27-2019 18:25 Comments (0)

Sometimes waiting for the weekend is better than the weekend itself.

←Rate | 08-25-2019 08:01 Comments (0)

If you see me in Atlanta this weekend, at a Taylor Swift concert, that's not me.

←Rate | 08-23-2019 13:15 Comments (0)

[coworker interrupting my story about how my weekend was] first of all McDonald’s doesn’t even have soup

←Rate | 08-18-2019 07:47 Comments (0)

Remember as we are planing for our tomorrows, our brave soilders are giving theirs today.. Have a safe an wonderful Memorial Day weekend everyone!!

←Rate | 05-25-2019 08:00 Comments (0)

Ladies in Atlanta this weekend, every big dude is not an NFL player, don't get knocked up by the cook from Waffle House

←Rate | 02-03-2019 21:51 Comments (0)

I was thinking about going to Walmart for Black Friday but I couldn't find my pajamas.

←Rate | 11-26-2018 13:34 Comments (0)

Girlfriend asked me to come to her place for a Black Friday special. All clothes were 100% off.

←Rate | 11-23-2018 02:41 Comments (0)

I wish the weekend came as fast as my ex did.

←Rate | 05-15-2018 22:35 Comments (0)

The only difference between a weekday and a weekend is which boss is telling me to do things.

←Rate | 05-11-2018 22:31 by @thecatwhisperer Comments (0)

So many accidents with Hillary. I'm not even sure she still alive, maybe they're just dragging her body like in Weekend at Bernie's

←Rate | 03-16-2018 14:28 by David Comments (0)

I think I lost an hour reading all the tweets about how people lost an hour this weekend

←Rate | 03-11-2018 23:55 Comments (0)

I think daylight saving time should start on a friday at 4pm instead of 2am sunday morning.

←Rate | 03-10-2018 20:23 Comments (0)

I just got the minivan washed if anyone wants to party this weekend.

←Rate | 03-03-2018 11:09 Comments (0)

Beginning to question my plans to go yachting with Robert Wagner this weekend.

←Rate | 02-11-2018 14:54 Comments (0)

Watching Friday the 13th. A load of awful make-up on brain-dead zombies. Oh wait. Sorry, wrong channel. This is "The View".

←Rate | 01-13-2018 11:13 Comments (0)

Cats always have that look on their face like you just asked if they would help you move next weekend

←Rate | 12-22-2017 17:18 Comments (0)

Gun sales hit #1 record for a Black Friday sales item.

←Rate | 11-27-2017 04:50 Comments (3)

Went to a Black Friday thing a my sweetheart’s house… all clothes were 100% off.

←Rate | 11-25-2017 05:37 Comments (0)

Black Friday: Because only in America, people trample each other for sales exactly one day after being thankful for what they already have.

←Rate | 11-21-2017 21:52 by UKGuy Comments (0)

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