Funny Status Messages and Tweets

Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.

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   messageicon Thanks for sharing your moon with me on Instagram. We don't have a moon where I live.
←Rate | 07-17-2014 11:32 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon Don't religious people have the same said "blog" where they can be stupid without boring the rest of US? How "Christian" to talk crap about others...religious people are some of the BIGGEST hypocrites and most judgmental people I know of.
←Rate | 07-17-2014 11:19 Comments (15)  


   messageicon It's so depressing how the <3 symbol looks like someone dropped their ice cream cone.
←Rate | 07-17-2014 09:47 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Look officer, I'm a woman I answer to no one.
←Rate | 07-17-2014 09:38 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I don't know if anyone been in the new Mus-lim clothing store in the mall but I suggest you don't ask if they have any bomber jackets in stock....They didn't like that at all.
←Rate | 07-17-2014 09:27 Comments (0)  


   messageicon "We look down on other fish fingers" - A Birds Eye view.
←Rate | 07-17-2014 08:41 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dear Automatic Toilet Flusher: I appreciate your enthusiasm but I wasn't done yet.
←Rate | 07-17-2014 07:05 Comments (0)  


   messageicon my safe word is "is that blood?!"
←Rate | 07-17-2014 02:35 Comments (0)  


   messageicon A woman that doesn't ask for nothing deserves everything
←Rate | 07-17-2014 01:45 Comments (0)  


   messageicon It's not love if she takes the money off of the dresser.
←Rate | 07-17-2014 01:43 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Your restraining order says NO But your lazy eye says.......maybe later.
←Rate | 07-17-2014 01:42 Comments (0)  


   messageicon “Let me rephrase this question so I can get pissed off at you all over again.” - WOMEN
←Rate | 07-17-2014 01:42 by Czovczov Comments (0)  


   messageicon "I just want a man who is honest, and will tell me what he is thinking" - Wishful thinking by women
←Rate | 07-17-2014 01:34 Comments (0)  


   messageicon "When people fight and hate and kill over Me I'm obviously very flattered." - GOD
←Rate | 07-17-2014 01:30 Comments (1)  


   messageicon It's funny how you become mom's new favorite when your sibling goes to jail.
←Rate | 07-17-2014 01:29 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon Maybe cops who plant evidence just really love gardening.
←Rate | 07-17-2014 01:28 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon Cooking is only the second best thing I can do in the kitchen.
←Rate | 07-17-2014 01:27 Comments (0)  


   messageicon So "instagram" doesn't mean your dealer is right around the corner?
←Rate | 07-17-2014 01:14 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon I hope Micheal Sam wins an ESPY for breakout female athlete of the year
←Rate | 07-16-2014 21:15 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I have more people on my block list than some of you have on your friends list. . .
←Rate | 07-16-2014 20:07 by JAB Comments (0)  




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