life Funny Status Messages
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poor life decisions on your part, does not constant an emergancy on my part. 
wondering why people think bartenders care about your misrable life. We dont! Now leave some cash and be on your way!
gonna update this status, but I got high. I was gonna let you in on my life, but I got high. Now I'm behind the times, and I know why... hey eh, cuz I got high, cuz I got high, cuz I got high!
Precision. Concentration. Patience. Fearlessness. Four skills I possess while shaving my nuts that I wish I could apply to other aspects of my life.
wishes I could measure how much of my life has passed me by while I played with my iPhone. . . Maybe there's an app for that.
Life is 10% of what happens to me, and 90% how I react to it!
out making some changes in his life...leave a message and I'll get back to you. if I don't return your message your one of the changes
Life is a waste of time. Time is a waste of life. So lets all get wasted and have the time of our lives!
life is like the Mets I just can't win
Wishes life was like a Nintendo game, if you had a problem you just take it out and blow on it. And everything would be fine
Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7 of your life
when it comes down to it, it's the little thongs in life that makes it all worthwhile...
gave up drinking and smoking... Worst ten minutes of my life.
thinks: The greatest pleasure in life is "not" doing what people say you can do.I call it the middle finger logic.
,"for god so loved the world that he gave his one and only begotten son,that whoever shall believe in him shall not perish but have eternal life."JOHN 3:16
not an actor on TV but is one in real life.
people are always asking whats the meaning of life, why dont they just look it up in the dictionary. Duh!!!!
was trying to live the "Sorority Life" in "Farmville", but got caught up in the "Mafia Wars" at "Farmtown".....now my "Farkle" is all "Bejeweled" up!!!!!...help!!!!!
taking life with a pinch of Salt...with a slice of lemon...and a shot of Tequlia!!!
MARRIED: STOP, ok, on my list of things to do in life, getting married is LAST, right after suicide!!! [Search Results] [View All Messages]
