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Just turned on the NBA game on the "Spur" of the moment.
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06-15-2014 21:12
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Today is the most confusing day in the hood... You are not the father!!!!! Maury
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06-15-2014 13:55
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She died doing what she loved. Taking a car selfie.
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06-15-2014 13:44
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Shout out to all the deadbeat dads and sperm donors this Father's Day. Unbeknownst to you, there are kids everywhere that are becoming AMAZING PEOPLE because they want to be nothing like you.
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06-15-2014 13:15 by
Goodeolboy
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Reach for the stars and let your feet leave the ground now. Thanks for 40 years of great memories.
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06-15-2014 12:42
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I just need like 3 or 4 girls I can be faithful to.
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06-15-2014 12:34
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You actually have friends? "Yeah, all 10 seasons on DVD!"
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06-15-2014 12:34
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Id like to wish myself a happy Pulling Out Day !!!
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06-15-2014 12:29 by
BearMaster
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"How much for the super-cool fanny pack?" "Ma'am, that's a colostomy bag."
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06-15-2014 12:19
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Hi can you fill this prescription please? Sir this is just a post-it note with 'give me the good stuff' written on it.
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06-15-2014 11:59
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I asked her how her day went 4 days ago and she is still telling me about it.
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06-15-2014 11:55 by
Kisstopher707
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No thanks responsibility, I have a Facebook account.
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06-15-2014 11:44
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Pick your toughest sucker players out.And put them in a ring with our worst nfl team, we'll still beat the S**t out of them
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06-15-2014 10:57
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On a scale of 1 to leave 100 missed calls on my phone if I fail to reply your text message within 2 minutes, how crazy are you?
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06-15-2014 10:56
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Men that wear Crocs have seen every episode of 'Keeping up with the Kardashians'
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06-15-2014 10:46 by
Baddie
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Dear Dad, Thanks for not pulling out! Happy Father's Day!!!
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06-15-2014 10:19
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There's no such thing as hot lesbians. They're just chicks who had too much to drink.
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06-15-2014 10:16
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How to tell if a woman is mad at you: 1.She's quiet 2.She's yelling 3.She acts the same 4.She acts different 5.She murdered you
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06-15-2014 09:57 by
andrew jackson
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The rest of the world loves soccer. That's what Russia said about communism.
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06-15-2014 09:03
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I've never watched the World Cup to actually watch soccer. I watch it for the fans that riots after their team loses.
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06-15-2014 07:44
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