Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
Page: 1424 of 6384
Why do people always make jokes insinuating that people who use crayons are crazy? I like my crayons! Especially the blue one. It makes my poo purple
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10-22-2015 23:46
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The hardest job in the world must be working in a bubble wrap factory. Can you imagine the self control that is required to work there, "must not pop bubbles"
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10-22-2015 23:45
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After years of observation,multiple hypothesis,well-structured analysis and deeply reviewed interpretations.I finally came to ONE CONCLUSION: I'M NOT NORMAL
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10-22-2015 23:44
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let my personalities out for a night...I woke up with two hookers, a penguin, a pineapple, five teeth missing, and a tattoo that read "I'M FREE".
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10-22-2015 23:44
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look at this, it's a stick man rubbing his butt on the ground! ________&_________
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10-22-2015 23:43
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Paul Ryan joins older siblings, Rex and Rob, in attempt to lead dozens of grown men determined to undermine him.
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10-22-2015 22:14 by DS
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eHarmony has a 24 month plan. How fcuking ugly do you have to be to need 2 years to find someone??
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10-22-2015 21:57
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Congrats to Lamar Odom. The first guy to have cocaine and bookers actually save his marriage.
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10-22-2015 19:50 by Jeff W
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as it turns out that 3 is the amount of times you can suck on your dentist's finger before she stops believing that you're doing it accidentally.
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10-22-2015 19:24
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The reason why you don't have a hoverboard is because Marty McFly and Doc Brown screwed up the timeline with their time traveling
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10-22-2015 17:17
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Back to the future was yesterday people hello the 21st not the 22nd retards
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10-22-2015 16:42
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..... I turned my Back on the Back to the Future Day today. Where's my Hoverboard dammit?
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10-21-2015 22:29
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I expect to see a speeding ticket for a DeLorean going at least 89MPH today.
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10-21-2015 16:01 by lkl627
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Fun Fact: It took 4 trips back in time before Marty McFly was able to resist having sex with his mother.
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10-21-2015 15:08
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.... Just think ..... after this week ...... everything in "Back to the Future" will take place entirely in the past!
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10-21-2015 14:33
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Welcome back Marty McFly...and Dr. Emmett Brown ...Great scott.!!!
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10-21-2015 14:17
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So who is going to go see Jaws 19 in 3d with me tonight?
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10-21-2015 13:00 by DeAdMaN
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If there was an earthquake today, Marty McFly wouldn't notice.
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10-21-2015 12:43
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Who cares if its back to the future day The real version is Marty is on welfare and Doc is in jail for touching little boys.
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10-21-2015 12:15
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People in sleeping bags are the soft tacos of the bear world
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10-21-2015 10:53
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