life Funny Status Messages

   says As a young child Bell, Biv, Devoe taught me the most important life lesson----Never trust a big butt and a smile....that girl is poison

   No you are not an independant woman... You are just an adult. Having a car, paying yo bills, paying rent is part of adult life

   Just a tip for living a long and happy life: TRY NOT TO DIE

   Our attitude toward life determines life's attitude towards us.

   Take the chance, live out your dreams, make life better than it seems.

   The hardest thing in life is letting go of what you thought was real.

   ► Play the moments ▌▌ Pause the memories ■ Stop the pain ◄◄ Rewind the happiness. Be a remote in your life

   It always seems like as soon as you start to figure out that life is a real b!tch, it has puppies.

   I wonder if all hot girls go through life believing that everyone is being genuinely nice to them all the time.

   Terrorists are like salmon, life is good until the seals show up

   There comes a point in every unicyclist's life when he sees a bicycle and says, "Jesus, they make them with 2 wheels now. I've been a fool."

   Treat life like an ocean, your heart is the shore and friends are the waves. It never matters how many waves there are, what matters is which ones touch the shore.

   If I ever get married again, the woman I marry must have worked at Subway at some point in their life. I need to know they have experience making me sammiches. :-)

   • My life. My choices. My mistakes. My lessons. Not your business.

   just spent 30 minutes entering ridiculous symptoms into WebMD and it diagnosed me as having no life and being immature. Pshhh!

   A celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to become well known, then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized...lol :P

   Sometimes it's hard to know know what to say to cheer someone up who's going through a rough patch in their life. Turns out letting them stare at my cleavage is enough.

   Why is a strike in bowling a good thing, but a strike in baseball is bad? I guess sports really do mirror real life...how you play the game all depends on the size of your balls.

   Twitter makes me love people I've never met and Facebook makes me hate people I know in real life.

   If life gave Lady Gaga lemons, she'd probably make an outfit out of them.