love Funny Status Messages

   What if you are an atheist, and you're stuck behind a guy with a "Honk if You Love Jesus" bumper sticker at a traffic light?

   I love Fall.... Unless it's Cold, Damp and Dark. Then I hate Fall.

   I love the fact that "Take Out" means food, dating, and murder.

   Imagine having an IQ low enough to enjoy watching love island.

   Her: How deep is your love? Me: 8 inches. 3 if you actually have a ruler with you.

   Come on people now Smile on your brother Everybody get together Try to love one another Right now

   Women fall in love by what they hear. Men fall in love with what they see. That's why women wear makeup and men lie.

   I love you more then a click of your like buttons.

   I'm attending the next Trump rally because I love puppet shows.

   I love that "take out" means food, dating, and murder.

   Dating in your 20s: I love you so much. Let's get married! 30s: We get along pretty well. We should live together? 40s: I guess you can stay the night but don't touch my damn stuff.

   Calm her down. Women love to be calmed down.

   Dear Maw & Paw. I've been captured by the blue wave. They actually fed me, clothed me, got me medical attention, and teaching me to read. Total monsters.....Love, your son, Billy Bob.

   George Lucas is going to remake a Country & Western version of Star Wars. The theme song will be called "Looking for Love in Alderaan Places."

   I love your enthusiasm, so I’m going to loosen your restraints.

   Cheating your wife doesn't mean that you don't love her...it's like hiring a taxi when you have your own car at home...it saves tires and longer lasting beauty and reduces mileage...Send this to your wife and let me know which hospital you are in..

   Things to do.. #1 dig a hole #2 name it love #3 watch people fall in love

   Dogs love you even if you’re ugly.

   i have a man flu. I had a good run, I think this is the end for me. Tell my family I love them.

   You wake up from a coma only to realize everyone you love has abandoned you because they went through your phone while you were out.