Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
Page: 1063 of 6384
Y'all freaking out about the clowns as if women aren't afraid of being murdered by strange men while walking alone at night all the time.
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10-09-2016 03:58
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At this rate, it's starting to seem like Americans will be voting on which candidate to keep out of jail in November.
Hmmmmmm ..... One says nasty words ........ The other does Nasty things. I wonder which one would hurt you most.
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10-09-2016 01:29
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hey didn't Bernie wright a fantasy essay in 1972 fantasizing about raping people? .... Naw .... Dems don't do stuff like that
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10-09-2016 01:10
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I'm sure glad there isn't a microphone around to record every thing I say in private.
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10-09-2016 01:03
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..... This is really weird .... For some strange reason ..... every time I pick up my Cat I end up thinking about Donald Trump.
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10-09-2016 00:46
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hope the next presidential debate starts with a handshake, instead of Trump grabbing Hillary by.........
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10-08-2016 22:27
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My wife says we will only eat orange Skittles while watching the second presidential debate.
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10-08-2016 22:21
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Did you know the women in Trump's family learned a long time ago how to protect their private parts when Trump is around them.
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10-08-2016 22:17
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Hey, If American women are outraged at a presidential candidate's use of Naughty words .... Who the heck bought those ... 80 MILLION COPIES OF 50 SHADES OF GREY????
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10-08-2016 19:50
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Has anyone considered that Trump might be a Galaxy Note 7?
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10-08-2016 18:58 by snotty
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The crappy thing is,,, there are people that will vote for Trump,,, but would punish their kids for just saying the word "Pu$$y".
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10-08-2016 18:13 by snotty
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We've spent years planning and preparing for the zombie apocalypse all for nothing......clowns....its gonna be clowns that finish us off.
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10-08-2016 17:18
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I once saw Tony the Tiger and the Trix rabbit having Chex. It was grrrrrrross.
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10-08-2016 16:45
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The best way to cook ramen noodles is to boil water, add noodles, wait three minutes, then try not to think about your life.
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10-08-2016 16:36
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Go ahead, criticize my overprotective parenting but no gorillas were shot on my watch.
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10-08-2016 16:31
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I try not to think about things I can't control like war and poverty and my personal life.
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10-08-2016 16:30
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Did you know that grapefruit tastes like it's trying to kill you.
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10-08-2016 16:29
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Netflix removed my 3 year old's favorite movie. THE APOCALYPSE IS NOW!!!
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10-08-2016 16:28
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My stripper name would be "Placebo Effect".
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10-08-2016 16:27
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