LadyInRed Funny Status Messages

   Besides me & Bryan Adams who else remembers the summer of 69 ?

   Gas prices are at an all time high. But the gov't is willing to up the mega millions jackpot to 640 million dollars. Someones priorities are F'ed up if you ask me.

   You remember the good ol days when you used to get mad at someone if they didn't have you as a friend on their top Myspace list?

   My mother always said "if you have nothing nice to say then don't say anything at all." I hope she's happy my mime career has taken off.

   The transition from woman to cougar happens when you go from Marlboro Lights to Virginia Slims.

   Can't wait until they make odorless whiskey so I don't have to be embarrassed when I open my Gatorade at AA meetings.

   Football announcers saying "penetration" repeatedly is my 50 Shades of Grey.

   If I wanted to see American Horror Story I would just stalk the Kardashians