Billy Funny Status Messages

   My brain hurts from all the serious issues being discussed on "Fox News"... I think I'll turn the tv to "CNN" for a little comic relief

   The 33 miners trapped deep underground have apparently been given the bad news that it will take 3 months to dig them out of deep hole... I wish our government would tell us when we could expect being dug out of "Our Hole"

   I "HOPE" we can "CHANGE" it back!

   I wish James J. Lee had watched CNN News instead of the Discovery channel.

   Just tried to wake my wife up, by throwing skittles at her... yelling, Wake Up, and taste the rainbow.

   Your Hope has been redistributed... Here's your Change.

   Skipping the new "Jackass" movie... already saw Whoopi Goldberg and Joy Behar on "The View" this week.

   It's a sad state of affairs when most Americans don't know... Separation of church and state is not in the Constitution.

   White House says Obama's "Daily Show" appearance was a success... In related news, the White House says Obama successfully poured cereal in his bowl this morning.

   If I have to pass a drug test to work my ass off, you should have to pass one to get welfare!!!

   If we really want to keep our sensitive documents safe... Why don't we keep them with Obamas birth certificate?

   I have to admit... I've learned quite a bit about Egyptians over the past week... For example, I was very surprised to see how Egyptians really walk.

   Just clicked a link that promised to show, "the world's largest breasts."... It was just a picture of Michael Moore taking his shirt off.

   An autopsy report reviled that marijuana was found in Trayvon's blood system... Now I'm really pissed!  Zimmerman making Travon smoke weed before shooting him? That's just wrong!

   The way Obama keeps blaming everything on George W. Bush... I really don't think Bush has a chance of winning the election!

   I'd give anything if I could just hear George Jefferson call us "Honky" one more time!

   ♬ Boots on the ground, boots on the ground, looking like a fool with boots on the ground! ♬

   RIP to the other guy in the car with Paul Walker who isn't being recognized because he's not famous.

   Papa Bear: Read the part again where she burns her whore mouth on my porridge.