love Funny Status Messages

   I "don't lock my phone," love you.

   I love tequila because I like where I wake up to be a surprise.

   The world is ending tomorrow & we still don't know who let the dogs out, what is love, & Where's Waldo ,or Victoria's secret

   Man I hate Taylor Swift..I mean don't you wanna put her over your knee and spank her azz,,,her tight, firm, round azz,,,and pull her hair,,,her soft, flowing beautiful hair,,,man I love Taylor Swift.

   As I scroll through my FB feed this holiday season, I find myself overcome with emotion and love. And then I remember I've had a lot of tequila and eggnog and I pass out on the floor.

   I love a woman in a suit! Her birthday suit that is.

   I love eavesdropping on people's private conversations. Always hoping I hear something that leads to me foiling a terrorist plot.

   How much does it cost these days to make someone love you?

   When you love someone you take interest in their interests or at least pretend to.

   My love for bacon is kinda like diarrhea... I just can't hold it in ツ

   i love when rich people compliment me on things that I spent less than $5 on

   Just because I tell you that I love you does not mean I really do. I might be drunk. Or just really, really horny.

   OK girls...we aren't ignoring you, we are not being disrespectful, we hear the phone ringing, we hear the text notification!! We still love you, thank you for all you do.....So go shopping or get your nails done, go out with the girls or get something wax

   From the creator of ‘'I Like You As A Friend'' and ‘'I Love You Like A Brother'' comes in 3D ‘'I Don't Know How To Tell You You're Ugly''

   I love you but I'm too lazy to show it.

   boy, the day flys by when you do something you love. Like sleep till Noon...

   Meant to tell my kids "Good night, I love you", but it came out as "Thank god you go back to school on Wednesday because this is bulls**t."

   I love you more than I hate everyone else.

   Rule number five... Show no love. Love will get you killed.

   Just because I don't like you doesn't mean I want you to stop being in love with me.