love Funny Status Messages

   Anybody that says I'll steal your heart, mind, love etc. you definitely aren't allowed in my house. And you will be frisked for knives.

   First, Love Yourself!..........Everyone Else, get in line!!!

   I just love waking up in the middle of the night, to find I still have hours to sleep before I have to be at work!!!

   As you Mature, you learn that you cannot make someone love you!.....All you can do is Stalk them and hope they panic and give in!!!

   GUYS: dont you just love it when your girlfriends friends have worse relationships than yours!!!!

   For the love of God, ASK me, don't AXE me!

   I'm not religious, but I love God.

   There are worse things than being far away from the one you love, like sleeping next to someone you don't.

   Love is me pooping while she brushes her teeth, and when she starts to leave I say "but wait, there's more" and splash another log. We laugh

   now the jumping on Oprah's couch professing my love for Katie is even embarrassing to me. - Tom Cruise

   Maybe I'm just a hopeless romantic but I kinda always thought Tom and Katie would eventually fall in love.

   All I want is for someone to pretend to love me for who I am, then gradually change me over a period of several years until we both hate me.

   Hey there automatic flushing toilet. I love your enthusiasm but ummm..... I wasn't finished yet.

   I still remember that moment I said I love you too, coz thats the exact moment my life got fuçked up!

   The public is jealous and takes pleasure in destroying good relationships. So what the public doesn't know exist, the public can't destroy. So lets keep our love a secret baby and let it live.

   Piglets are so cute. I love it how we eat them when they get fat and ugly.

   There's someone out there for everyone. Don't worry if you're alone, your true love is just having sex with someone else right now.

   Love may be blind, but It doesn't have to be stupid.

   If getting people to love you by dangling them over an eternal pit of hell fire is wrong, I don't want to be right.

   I haven't yet met someone who shares my idea of what love really is.