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"I Hate or Can't Stand Drama" is translation for "I'm gonna be the first one to cause all the Drama Tonight, just thought I would give you the heads up!"
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08-30-2010 14:16 by
DYLAN BOSCH
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I have found that the best stress reliever in life is not giving a crap.
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08-30-2010 14:35 by
MBH
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A smile is like tight underwear... it makes your cheeks go up.
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08-30-2010 14:46 by
MBH
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There is nothing more convenient than putting on a pair of pants that already has the belt on.
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08-30-2010 14:51
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reminds you that silence is golden, but duct tape is silver
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08-30-2010 15:27
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Trying to figure out how I got this headache...nevermind I just found a receipt telling me.
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08-30-2010 15:40 by
FrankieJ
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Paris Hilton thanks fans for their support following cocaine arrest. In other breaking news: Paris Hilton has fans?!
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08-30-2010 16:27
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SURGEON GENERAL'S WARNING: Smoking during pregnancy can cause your baby to look like Herve Villacheze.
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08-30-2010 17:25
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The hardest part about business is minding your own.
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08-30-2010 17:35 by
CJ
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I wish my book of life was written in pencil There are a few pages I would like to erase.
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08-30-2010 17:37
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Never steal. The government hates competition.
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08-30-2010 17:38 by
CJ
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I had an appointment at the sperm bank today, but I had to call up to say I couldn't come.
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08-30-2010 17:41 by
jack
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Only when the last tree has died, the last river been poisoned and the last fish been caught will we realize we cannot eat money..!!
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08-30-2010 18:31 by
Mallory
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Updating your status at the gym burns a lot of calories.
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08-30-2010 22:04 by
Max
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welcome to the Dark Side. Are you surprised that we don't have cookies?
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08-30-2010 22:44 by
BitMaP
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You call that show "Man vs. Food", But I call it "Keeping Up With The Kardashians."
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08-31-2010 00:41 by
RussellBilaknockified
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Yesterday I was 2 away from a threesome. I love college!
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08-31-2010 01:20
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1994 is the worst year ever, Kurt Cobain died and Justin Bieber was born
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08-31-2010 03:10
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I don't know! I don't know why I did it, I don't know why I enjoyed it, and I don't know why I'll do it again!
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08-31-2010 03:17
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planning a vacation to get away from people....see you guys in couple of hours, will facebook hourly to update you guys about my vacation
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08-31-2010 07:36
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