Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
Page: 6354 of 6408

Disney has a new movie coming out on Disney + tomorrow. Tinker Tinkerbell meets her brother, Taco.

I don't understand why people get in the left lane just to drive the speed limit. That lane is for crime.
←Rate |
10-08-2023 16:21
Comments (0)

If you have to pay a celebrity millions to hawk your product, your product must suck.
←Rate |
10-09-2023 18:48
Comments (0)

If you call me from a private number, I'll respect your privacy and not answer.

So, like... where's God hiding while this Middle East conflict rages on?

The purpose of a meme is to disturb the humorless and to humor the disturbed.

The reason why the NFL doesn't have very many women referees is because they would be too busy bringing up penalties from 10 years ago.

Then there was the blind prostitute. You really gotta hand it to her....
←Rate |
10-13-2023 19:59
Comments (0)

I told my supervisor I'm coming in on Halloween as a ghost. I'll be here, you just won't see me.

Marriage tip: We live in a day of women's equality! So because of this, never ever get your wife's door in the car for her, or open a door for her. Let her do it herself, because hey, equal rights, right?

Q. Can you name a fisherman's tool and a popular search engine? A. Netanyahu.

Dating right now,
is like trusting a public defender.

I have a message for the thief who stole 100 cans of Red Bull from my car: How do you sleep at night?

I feel like someone should've warned Travis Kelce about the crazy...
←Rate |
10-18-2023 13:53
Comments (0)

I’m going to start telling women that I’m available for a limited time only in hopes that their shopping instinct kicks in
←Rate |
10-19-2023 09:00 by RobbieG
Comments (0)

why did the chicken cross the road? because it went to the chicken
←Rate |
10-19-2023 11:07 by anonymous
Comments (0)

If you don't like your coworkers, go to work dressed up like a bear. Tell people "don't poke the bear"
←Rate |
10-20-2023 20:33 by Eddy
Comments (0)

I just saw a mosquito with a coat on. They're not giving up!

Halloween
←Rate |
10-23-2023 23:49
Comments (0)

That awkward moment when you're absolute SURE you're gonna die after leaning your chair back too far