love Funny Status Messages

   My girlfriend loves it when I talk dirty to her during sex. I'm pissed off at her though, so tonight when we make love I'm going to tell her how beautiful she is.

   My name is I, My problem is LOVE, The solution is YOU.

   The Bible teaches you to love - and the Kamasutra explains how

   8yrs ago my wife decided to keep me when nobody else would. I bet she regrets that at least every other day. I definitely got the better half of the deal. Happy Anniversary Honey. Love you lots. And a special thanks to you, Facebook for reminding me;)

   I love long, romantic walks to the fridge ♥

   Problem is people confuse LOVE with BUSINESS. If you are with her because she gives the best BJs and she is with you because you pay all her bills then thats not a LOVE affair, that's just a BUSINESS arrangement.

   "Lady Thatcher will not be seeing Sarah Palin. That would be belittling for Margaret. Sarah Palin is nuts." I love it!

   Twitter makes me love people I've never met and Facebook makes me hate people I know in real life.

   Love is one long sweet dream… and marriage is the alarm clock.

   I love seeing the Australian news cause it's like they're from the future.

   Loving someone who doesn't love you back is like hugging a cactus. The tighter you hold on, the more it hurts.

   Love is a thing for two...but there's always a slut who doesn't know how to count.

   I love those sayings that have 2 opposite words in them... Exact Estimate - Act Naturally - Small Crowd - Found Missing - Happily Married...

   What I love best about sex with a married woman is wiping myself off with her husband's clean underwear!

   I don't love with my heart...I love with my imagination.

   Hey couples who write on each others Facebook walls, NO ONE cares how much you love each other, so cut it out!

   I love how my laptopshasta a warning that says You should change your battery or switch to outlet power immediately to keep from losing your work. Lol "work". I wish I got paid to watch porn..

   The minute people fall in love they become liars

   There's 8 letters in I LOVE YOU but there's also 8 letters in BULLSH!T!

   Love is like a rubber band. At first we keep on pulling and pulling. Then when someone let go, it hurts the person who holds on.