trump Funny Status Messages

   I can think of one group of workers who are doing much better under this Trump presidency....comedians

   You people do realize that Trump's wife is an immigrant, right? Yes. And she is a LEGAL immigrant.

   The odds that Trump will get a fair shake from the corned beef pickle munching media are about as good as the odds I'll get a Justin Bieber tattoo in the small of my back!

   7 earth-like planets have been discovered nearby, with growing fear of illegal aliens, Trump has decided to turn his wall into a dome.

   Madonna was offering blowjobs to men for their vote for Hillary. I took the blow job and still voted for Trump. . .

   Rep. Maxine Waters refused to attend Trump's address to the joint session of Congress Instead she stayed home to work on a bill addressing the Russian invasion of Korea.

   If Hunter Biden's name was Hunter Trump, the media would be killing him right now...

   Trump just blame Obama for wire-tapping his phone. My phone just got tapped too, I blame Trump.

   Don't forget to tutn your clocks forward to eliminate one hour of the Trump presidency.

   Take Nixon into the deepest days of his Watergate paranoia, subtract 50 IQ points, add Twitter, and you have Trump today.

   I was microwaving my lunch at work today ant three Trump supporters accused me of spying on the President.

   when Trump said "Obama wiretapped me," he didn't mean "Obama wiretapped me." Which part of Obama wiretapped me don't you people understand?

   When people simply scale the fence to the White House it really goes to show just how utterly pointless Donald Trump's border wall will be.

   Trump asking the media not to be rude is like Jeffery Dahmer criticizing a victim for their dining etiquette.

   An intruder at the White House? Perhaps Trump should start with a garden wall before biting off more than he can chew.

   I just want to see how many stupid people there are. If you think microwaves are spying on Trump, vote down. If not, vote up.

   Trump wants a 30 foot wall.> i'm starting a 35 foot ladder business.

   President Trump's wild accusations shocked Melania because she knew first hand that nothing was getting "tapped" in Trump Tower.

   Watching Trump meet with various world leaders is like witnessing someone go on a bunch of really bad first dates.

   Reagan had ketchup in school lunches declared a vegetable, so maybe Congress can have Trump declared a vegetable.