jackson Funny Status Messages

   Just downloaded the new Samuel L Jackson voice to my Echo, now it wont quit asking me "whats in my wallet"...

   I'd be 100 % more motivated if Samuel L. Jackson yelled at me to get things done.

   According to SOPA you can get five years for downloading a Michael Jackson song illegally, that's a year more than the doctor who killed him.

   I don't know about Samuel Jackson doing Capitol One commercials. Something about an angry black man asking what's in my wallet makes me very nervous.

   I am still sitting here completely in Awe of how Samuel L Jackson is going to be portraying Martin Luther King, Jr. I can picture it now, "I had a dream mother f*cker!"

   I'm starting to think the Jackson family might have some problems.

   My mask broke while I was in a store and I felt like Janet Jackson at the Super Bowl.

   How is it possible that one of Michael Jackson's doctors is on trial... and it's not his plastic surgeon?

   A woman in Wisconsin named her child Marijuana Pepsi Cola Jackson. Proof that Aliens will not be invading us, because there is no intelligent life on this planet.

   The silence of President Obama, the Reverend Al Sharpton, Jesse Jackson and the rest of our black leaders on the killing of Kate Steinle sounds a lot like racism.

   Looks like Andrew Jackson's been tossed to the back of the bus.

   I found Samuel L. Jackson's swear jar and I don't think he's being completely honest with himself.

   I'd rather have Samuel L. Jackson narrate my life. No offense, Morgan Freeman...my life just requires multiple uses of the word motherf*cker.

   As I was watching the Lion King, I thought to myself .... So its ok for a monkey to hold a baby over a ledge, but when Micheal Jackson did it, all of a sudden there was a problem.

   Michael Jackson's bodyguards are now saying; "if Michael Jackson were alive, there is NO WAY he would want Dr Murray on trial." DUH if Michael Jackson was alive, Dr Murray WOULDN'T be on trial now would he? Well played bodyguards, well played.

   I'd love to watch Samuel L Jackson and Morgan Freeman get into a heated argument while James Earl Jones tries to stop them.

   It would be pretty cool if, on her last show, Oprah ripped off a mask and it was Michael Jackson.

   It's rumored that the Catholic Church is interested in buying Michael Jackson's Neverland Ranch. Does anyone not see the irony in this?

   I wonder if Michael Jackson actually looks like he did in the Thriller video by now...

   I am surprised no one has consulted Michael Jackson's doctor for advice on what drugs to use to for quick, painless executions.