Funny Status Messages and Tweets

   you can cross my mind, run thru it, play in it, bouncee across it, dance in it, there is alot of room in there...

   I went to buy a pair of camouflage pants, I couldn't find any!

   I see dumb people.

   Feel free to kiss my third point of contact.

   CAUTION: Blonde Thinking

   Feel free to call me a Hottie.

   YOU! Out of the Gene Pool.

   I got F C and K. The only thing missing is you !

   REMEMBER IN FAT AND SLIM: F - STANDS FOR FOOD AND S - FOR STARVATION

   ...just heard that the "Octomom" won't rule out having another baby...well then, I think we can safely rule out her having even one more brain cell left...

   Well,today was a total waste of makeup.

   What's that you say? I can't hear you over my free health care and worldly education. Douchebags!

   If at first you don't succeed; call it version 1.0

   there a toilet in your mouth or are you just talking crap again?

   Behind every successful student, there is one girlfriend. But what about a failed student.....? A beautiful teacher

   never allowed his schooling to interfere with his education.

   If we really knew exactly what we were getting into when we decided to have kids, I'm pretty sure we'd be screwed as a species.

   it true? are they finally serving milk at Hooters???

   encrypting a secret message within this status. Examine these words carefully. The first one to decrypt the message wins...

   was using a public restroom today and as I looked at the "posts" on the bathroom walls and the responses to each one, I realized where the idea for FB came from...