Funny Status Messages and Tweets

   If you insist on doing an April Fool's rib today, at least make a child cry.

   What if April Fools day doesn't really exist and it's actually the longest/greatest prank the world has ever seen......?

   Just changed in my change jar Had $729!!!! oh wait it was $7.29

   What if Captain Planet and Obama are gay lovers?

   did any of you guys ever have sex with 2 different women? In the same year?

   Sorry no one understood you were making an April Fool's joke because no one thinks you have a sense of humor.

   If you are crazy enough everyday is April fools' day.

   there such a thing as an April Fools' pregnancy test? Asking for a friend.

   Only fools fall in love, so today's the day!

   My April Fools day joke blew up in my face. I threatened divorce. My wife agreed.

   It's like nobody ever considers the consequences of getting to know me.

   I was gonna tell you that you're an idiot, but I think I'll just let my silence do the talking.

   I'm relationship intolerant.

   I hate when I tell someone I'm bored, and they suggest getting together. Then I have to explain that I'm not quite that bored.

   very special day today... just for atheists... Happy Fool's Day!!

   why is my writing white in the search bar up by the find status?

   my 3 year old boy just informed me that "they nailed Jesus to a plus sign"

   I spend like 82% of cleanup time trying not to say "or it gets the hose again" after telling the kids to put toys in the basket.

   says people with children always ask when you're having children like they get points for recruiting to their club of misery.

   Image makeover idea #1: Haiti should rename itself Likey.