Funny Status Messages and Tweets

   FOX News is reporting that Obama is being questioned for killing Jobs

   Looks like Steve Jobs is on his iCloud.

   Nobody ever pays me in gum ( -_-)

   Pancreatic cancer...There isn't an App for that.

   Did anybody try turning Steve Jobs off and then back on again? That usually works.

   I've come to realize I have very few friends at work. I have acquaintances, and approximately half of them will sell you out in a heartbeat.

   I guess MACs don't last longer then PCs........too soon IGuess

   Before I go to sleep, I start imagining stuff that I would like to happen.

   Evening news is where they begin with ‘Good evening', and then proceed to tell you why it isn't. 

   a womans mind is like a baby's diaper...gets changed many times throughout the day

   That urge you get to write “No one gives a crap” on someone's status.

   Life is harder for the beautiful people. I'm sorry you'll never know.

   You'll lose a lot of money, chasing women. But you'll never lose women, chasing money.

   iRIP: Steve Jobs as I sit here and learned about your death straight from the device you have invented the iPhone. Now as you set on your iCloud to the pearly gates. We will remember the greatest entrepreneur of our time. - Sent from my iPhone #1955-2011

   People say the hardest thing to do is watch the one you love, love someone else. Around here the hardest thing to do is replace the empty toilet paper roll and put your dishes in the dishwasher.

   Awesome idea for a new reality show. Amanda Knox and Cassey Anthony locked in a house together. We get to see who makes it out alive.

   I will type my name begining with an I in my status in honor of Steve Jobs

   The iPhone 4S: "For Steve."

   “Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma – which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of other's opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most

   If you live each day, as if it were your last... then one day you will most certainly be right.