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 Chuck Norris came from future to protect Terminator  
 
 
 		
		
 Chuck Norris can read lady gage's poker face
 
 
 		
		
 Chuck Norris made dorry stop swiming
 
 
 		
		
 Chuck Norris counted to infinity... twice
 
 
 		
		
 When Chuck Norris's daughter lost her virginity he went out and found it.
 
 
 		
		
 Chuck Norris's email is gmail@chucknorris.com
 
 
 		
		
 Chuck Norris sent Jesus a birthday card on December 25th and it wasn't Jesus’ birthday. Jesus was to scared to correct Chuck Norris and to this day December 25th is known as Jesus' birthday.   
 
 
 		
		
 Chuck Norris deleted his Facebook & created fist book!
 
 
 		
		
 I don't need walls around my heart... why? because Chuck Norris is guarding it
 
 
 		
		
 Chuck Norris went to the Virgin Islands and came back and they were just called The Islands
 
 
 		
		
 The movie Anaconda was shot it Chuck Norris's underwear...
 
 
 		
		
 Chuck Norris bottles his farts and sells them on Craigslist as cans of whoop ass
 
 
 		
		
 Chuck Norris's sperm is so tough that women have to chew it before they can swallow it.
 
 
 		
		
 Leading hand sanitizers claim to kill %99.99 of germs.  Chuck Norris can kill %100 of whatever the *blip* he wants.
 
 
 		
		
 "Chuck Norris's Twitter feed: Yes the rumors are true, it was me that killed Bin Laden. With my famous roundhouse kick."""""
 
 
 		
		
 Chuck Norris drinks napalm to quell his heartburn. 
 
 
 		
		
 The boogie man checks his closet every night for Chuck Norris
 
 
 		
		
 I no why no one can get close to the sun,  its cuz its Chuck Norris',  thats it, its his
 
 
 		
		
 Got milk? ..Chuck Norris does
 
 
 		
		
 How many woodchucks would Chuck Norris chuck if Chuck Norris would chuck woodchucks?
 
 
 		
		