herbncheese/oscar Funny Status Messages

   I'm a good boyfriend..I always talk to her, play with her, touch her buttons...I definitely turn her on... I love you Xbox.

   So I was looking at the Oregano at work and saw a cop come in and I don't know why but I hid it...

   I want my boss to tell my coworker to shave her mustache! If I have too she has to too.

   Cotton is getting expensive huh... If only there was a way to get people to pick cotton for free...hm

   my sub teacher in 11th grade was born without arms, he asked a girl "need a hand" & she laughed ..he should of slapped her!

   I'm so broke, cockroaches don't want to live with me.

   When I see a ugly girl looking In the mirror I like run to the mirror & throw water at it & say,"see your ugliness made it cry"....

   Im going to get a tattoo of my face on my back just so I could see who stabs me in the back..