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StonerDudee Funny Status Messages
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Page: 9 of 14
I propose that we abolish marriage and engage in 3 year contracts instead, with the option for renewal.
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06-20-2012 12:49 by
StonerDudee
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I prefer to call it a "Ta-Da" list. Cause it'd be fu*king amazing if I actually accomplished anything on it.
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10-02-2014 12:06 by
StonerDudee
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Did we try giving the government a snickers?
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10-02-2013 20:34 by
StonerDudee
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What's longer than most relationships these days? This status.
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09-13-2012 13:04 by
StonerDudee
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News: "3 Cliff Walkers Fall to Their Death" Wow, what were the chances of them all having the same name?
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12-26-2014 22:09 by
StonerDudee
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Moving all my retirement funds into a Colorado snack machine franchise.
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01-03-2014 11:03 by
StonerDudee
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If Obama really wanted to impress me... he'd somehow combine Missouri & Oregon to make a "Show me your beaver" state.
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10-19-2012 13:17 by
StonerDudee
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I always carry a picture of my wife and kids in my wallet. It reminds me of why there is no f*cking money in there.
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05-20-2013 00:51 by
StonerDudee
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Really offended these microwave instructions told me to turn my burrito over gently, like I don't treat every burrito with the utmost respec
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09-29-2013 01:57 by
StonerDudee
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People who get offended on the internet are the same people that take mini golf seriously.
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12-05-2012 14:10 by
StonerDudee
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Failed another job interview today. Apparently taking part in an orgy isn't proof that you can effectively work as part of a team.
43
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12-06-2012 11:39 by
StonerDudee
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The house from Home Alone is up for sale for 2.5 million dollars. F*ck that, the area's full of burglars.
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12-26-2014 22:07 by
StonerDudee
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If you're thinking of hanging out with your ex, jerk off first and see how you feel after that.
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04-23-2015 10:50 by
StonerDudee
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Never leave something good to find something better, because once you realize you had the best, the best has found better.
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08-22-2013 19:57 by
StonerDudee
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Got kicked out of a Gatorade convention. I guess standin behind the women and whispering "is it in you?" was the wrong thing to do.
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07-17-2012 22:05 by
StonerDudee
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'LSD makes users lose weight' That makes sense, it's kinda hard to get to the fridge when there's a dragon guarding it.
67
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10-14-2013 21:42 by
StonerDudee
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I wish all videos of people twerking ended with them catching on fire.
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09-09-2013 18:47 by
StonerDudee
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I seriously hate it when a couple starts having an argument in front of you. They could have least waited until I got dressed and left.
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07-31-2015 23:40 by
StonerDudee
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They say 1 in 4 men is homosexual. So there must be one in my group of friends. I hope its David he's super cute.
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06-14-2012 00:39 by
StonerDudee
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You know you're getting old when cops make you feel safe instead of nervous.
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01-09-2013 10:31 by
StonerDudee
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