Danmanz Funny Status Messages

   A teenager's brain is 80% song lyrics.

   It so crazy to see how many people are shocked by honesty, and how few by deceit.

   going to hell...and coming right back Hotter than ever.

   If winning was easy, losers would do it.

   SO....we got Charlie Sheen, Tiger Woods, Jesse James, Ben Roethlisberger, John Edwards, Chris Brown, John Mayer, and now Tiki Barber...Anybody else I missed?

   It's interesting how people claim to love/like their jobs, but ready to go home as soon as they get in the door.

   Women who say that men only want to have is sex are the women who have nothing else to offer than that.

   I look at my milk carton in the fridge and it read "Feb 14". Even my milk has a Valentine's date and I don't.

   thought about dozens of Vampire movies and shows for the past decade and wondered which ones sucked the life out him and the ones that just sucked.

   Police and doctors are fun to watch on TV. Just look at all the shows. In reality, its not as fun when they all watch you. You either done something wrong or something wrong has been done to you.

   FACT: Every woman got a girlfriend that they don't trust around their man.

   Could switching to Geico really save you 50% or more on car insurance???.....Does being on Facebook really give you the feeling that people's lives are a little over-exaggerated just by reading their status updates?

   Dear Ladies: Smiles are more attractive than duckfaces. Keep that in mind when you're editing your dating profile.

   Sugar Babies --- College girls hooking up with older men to pay their tuition.

   You ever notice sometimes all day on Wednesday you keep thinking its Thursday? Then when Thursday comes, you're al right again.

   Tell me and I'll forget; show me and I'll rememeber; involve me and I'll understand.

   Due to the scare of Dec 21, 2012, my "Baby Boom" Prediction should be coming up right on schedule this month and in September.

   One of the most dangerous weapons in our time.....Social Networking. And we're all trigger happy.

   eat your profile views and comments up. They'll make you big and popular because at the end of the day nobody's gonna give a damn right?........right.

   Once you hate someone, everything they do is offensive. "Look at this bit¢h breathing out of her nose like she owns the oxygen here."