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   messageicon I spend 90% of my time at the gym choosing the right song for my workout.
←Rate | 07-10-2012 09:44 by Huck Comments (0)  


   messageicon Whenever somebody calls me ugly, I get super sad and hug them because I know how hard life is for the visually impaired.
←Rate | 07-10-2012 21:55 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Love is a matter of chemistry,sex is a matter of physics.
←Rate | 12-09-2009 15:53 by Lemonpillow Comments (0)  


   messageicon Baldly going where no man has gone before…
←Rate | 02-01-2010 20:40 by The FRED Comments (0)  


   messageicon Well,today was a total waste of makeup.
←Rate | 02-25-2010 07:48 by Lemonpillow Comments (0)  


   messageicon wondering if they sell over-priced bottles of water in Fiji called America?
←Rate | 02-28-2010 13:08 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Gravity, is one of the Six Fundamental Forces of the Universe, with the other five being Magnetism , Duct Tape, Whining, Remote Control, and The Force That Pulls Dogs Toward The Groins Of Strangers.
←Rate | 03-06-2010 20:23 by Mr Craig Comments (0)  


   messageicon I thought I was having déjà vu, but it turns out I do the exact same things every day.
←Rate | 03-23-2010 14:35 Comments (0)  


   messageicon saw a man get out of his convertible at Wal-Mart yesterday, take two steps and then turn back to lock the doors. I chuckled because the top was down.
←Rate | 03-26-2010 09:03 by markf Comments (0)  


   messageicon Hates when people come inside her work when its nice out and says "It's so nice out too nice to be inside!" Thanks I couldn't tell it was too nice to be working, guess that big yellow thing in sky isn't a lemon!!!!!
←Rate | 04-07-2010 15:04 Comments (0)  


   messageicon note to self: even if someone really needs it, strangling them is still illegal. o_o
←Rate | 04-30-2010 16:09 Comments (0)  


   messageicon there is a midget in line in front of me at the Walgreens. He has a bag of pork rinds and a box of condoms...my question...which one do you think was the impulse buy?
←Rate | 05-14-2010 11:49 by htggems Comments (0)  


   messageicon Where did Macaulay Culkin get the cardboard people for the party in Home Alone? Don't tell me you haven't also wondered this from time to time.
←Rate | 05-21-2010 17:46 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon got rid of my vacuum cleaner. It was just gathering dust.
←Rate | 06-19-2010 19:45 by Aaron Comments (0)  


   messageicon Don't talk about yourself so much in front of some friends... they do it when you leave
←Rate | 06-22-2010 21:32 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon says; Life is so much easier than we think -- All we have to do is this: Accept the impossible, discard the indispensable, put up with the intolerable, and just smile at anything... of coarse doing these things is so much easier on drugs :)
←Rate | 05-29-2009 00:06 by Mark Symons | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon When you wish upon a shooting star, all your dreams will come true. Unless the star is really a meteor about to destroy the earth. Then, you're pretty much dead no matter what you wish for. Unless it's death by meteor.
←Rate | 07-30-2009 00:16 by David B | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon WARNING: GIVEADAMN.exe failed to load. Operation aborted.
←Rate | 08-27-2009 11:12 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon What's better?..A hot woman drinking more than you or that same woman buying you drinks?
←Rate | 09-21-2009 16:56 by Danmanz | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon People accuse me of being overly competitive. I'm not. I'm the most non-competitive person in the world. No one even comes close.
←Rate | 08-25-2010 12:41 by MBH Comments (0)  



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