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   messageicon If reincarnation were real, I'd like to come back as a stomach virus, so I could say that I truly give a sh!t….
←Rate | 02-07-2011 14:45 by M.A.C. Comments (0)  


   messageicon I guess CVS is going green. Today's receipt for cough drops was only 27 inches long.
←Rate | 02-10-2011 17:02 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just got an email from MySpace asking, "Where Have You Been?" Well MySpace, it hasn't been 2006 in a while.
←Rate | 02-10-2011 17:04 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon Life's journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally worn out, shouting "HOLY $HIT... WHAT A RIDE!"
←Rate | 02-11-2011 22:55 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you want to make enemies, go and try to change something. If you already have enemies, good! It means you've stood up for something sometime in your life.
←Rate | 02-28-2011 15:04 Comments (0)  


   messageicon R.I.P. "Macho Man" Randy Savage. I'll do a flying elbow drop from the foot of the bed to salute you!
←Rate | 05-20-2011 13:37 Comments (2)  


   messageicon The only place that the rapture happened was on myspace.
←Rate | 05-22-2011 03:25 Comments (0)  


   messageicon the next time I screw up bad I'll say "well at least I didnt predict the end of mankind and nothing happened"
←Rate | 05-22-2011 12:04 Comments (0)  


   messageicon After 10 Dos Equis beers, I think I'm the most interesting man in the world.
←Rate | 08-12-2011 12:21 by SuthernFukr Comments (0)  


   messageicon When I'm drunk, my phone should say "are you sure you want to send this text?"
←Rate | 08-29-2011 02:03 Comments (0)  


   messageicon People who remove the the vowels to text..why don't you do us all a favor and remove the consonants too?
←Rate | 09-04-2011 19:33 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon Don't keep telling yourself, "I deserve better" and continue to date worse.
←Rate | 09-09-2011 17:11 Comments (0)  


   messageicon High Heels are a man's invention to make it harder for a woman to run away.
←Rate | 10-12-2011 02:55 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  


   messageicon watched waterworld last nite, why was kevin costner and everyone so dirty when the entire world was covered in water?
←Rate | 04-29-2011 08:34 by allen dean Comments (0)  


   messageicon Maybe the people that say money can't buy happiness are just buying the wrong stuff?
←Rate | 05-04-2011 02:13 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon wishes that my brain would autocorrect words before they leave my mouth.
←Rate | 05-17-2011 10:57 Comments (0)  


   messageicon since it's the thought that counts.. I'll keep thinking about exercising.
←Rate | 07-27-2011 17:21 by @cdrizzzy Comments (0)  


   messageicon saw a naked man running down his road. I rolled down the car window and asked "hey why are you running stark naked " to which the naked man replied "because you are home early....."
←Rate | 02-05-2010 11:27 by samdave69 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm canadian and I want to say to America, Hey I love you guys, but seriously, you gotta take Jersey Shore off the air! You guys work on that and we'll see what we can do about Nickleback and Justin Beiber.
←Rate | 07-20-2011 23:10 by JeremyCakes Comments (1)  


   messageicon Ladies, it's not that there are no good men out there. It's just that you turned down 6 of em that wanted a chance to treat you right and you chose the a$$hole.
←Rate | 07-14-2011 23:28 by BEGO Comments (0)  



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